Eric Behr came up with a workaround that fixes
things for me with minimal fuss.  I am trying to keep
things stateful insofar as it is possible.  His solution
was after the keep state rule to have another rule
to pick up the OOW packets using an option I didn't
know even existed, the "with oow" option.

e.g. stateful first:

pass in quick proto tcp from X.Y.Z.0/24 to any flags S keep state keep frags
pass out proto tcp from any to any flags S keep state keep frags

Then the hack for my OOW from problem child:
pass in quick proto tcp from X.Y.Z.248/32 to any port = A with oow
pass out quick proto tcp from any port = A to X.Y.Z.248/32 with oow

I would prefer a more elegant solution, but this works fine.

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