Can I ask my husband to trim his beard?
Answered by Umm Salah
Question:
My husband and I are newly married. My husband has kept a beard for religious reasons and I have no problem with that (I am actually proud of him). He has also cut his hair really short and to be of equal length all the way round his head. But I would like him to have his hair short but done in a stylish way. I would also like him to keep his beard trimmed short (close to the face) and the same length all the way around. I do not mind him growing his beard to a fist length like it is recommended in Islam but not until 1 years time or so. Right now I would like him to do this just for the time being. I would really like him to do this just for my benefit as I believe that even though we have a great relationship I would like him to do this as a form of adornment for me, his wife, just as I would wear certain make-up or jewelry to adorn myself for
him.
Would it be Islamically permissible for me to ask him to do that, and him to do it for me?
Answer:
In the Name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful.
Praise be to Allah. May Allahs peace and blessings bestow upon our beloved Prophet, his family, companions, and those who follow them.
Dear Sister,
Your husband is ultimately the one who will decide how long he wears his beard or how he styles his hair, in the same way that you would decide how to wear your hair.
However, there are several factors to consider.
1. Growing a beard is Sunna for Muslim men because the Prophet, peace be upon him, commanded men to do so. You should encourage your husband to follow this Sunna.
2. The length of your husband's beard depends on which madhhab he follows. If he is Hanafi, then it is wajib (obligatory) for him to grow his beard at a fist's length from his face. However, if he is Maliki or Shafi'i then trimming his beard is fine.
3. Since there is a scholarly difference of opinion on just how much beard makes a beard, this is not something you and your husband should argue about.
4. There is also the Sunna of the Prophet that instructs men to adorn themselves for their wives and wives for their husbands. Perhaps you could balance between these considerations by picking a haircut for your husband that you like, while he grows his beard out.
Here are some additional links on SunniPath:
What do I do if my wife doesnt like me having a full beard?
http://www.sunnipath.com/resources/Questions/qa00004570.aspx
My Husband's Beard
http://www.sunnipath.com/resources/Questions/qa00000666.aspx
May Allah bless your marriage.
And Allah knows best.
Umm Salah (Zaynab Ansari)
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