ABU SUFYAAN IBN AL-HARITH

Rarely can one find a closer bond between two persons
such as existed between Muhammad the son of Abdullah
and Abu Sufyan the son of al-Harith. (This Abu Sufyan
of course was not the same as Abu Sufyan ibn Harb, the
powerful Quraysh chieftain.) 

Abu Sufyan ibn al-Harith was born about the same time
as the blessed Prophet. They resembled each other a
great deal. They grew up together and for a time lived
in the same household. Abu Sufyan was a cousin of the
Prophet. His father, al-Harith, was the brother of
Abdullah; both were sons of Abd al-Muttalib. 

Abu Sufyan was also a foster-brother of the Prophet.
He was for a short time nursed by the lady Halimah who
looked after the young Muhammad in the tough and
bracing atmosphere of the desert. 

In their childhood and youth, Abu Sufyan and Muhammad
were close and intimate friends. So close were they,
that one might naturally have expected Abu Sufyan to
have been among the first to respond to the call of
the Prophet, peace be upon him, and follow
wholeheartedly the religion of truth. But this was not
to be, at least not for many, many years. 

>From the time the Prophet made public his call to
Islam and first issued the warning to members of his
clan about the dangers of continuing in their existing
state of unbelief, injustice and immorality, the fire
of envy and hatred erupted in the breast of Abu
Sufyan. The bonds of kinship snapped. Where once there
was love and friendship, there was now revulsion and
hate. Where once there was brotherhood, there was now
resistance and opposition. 

Abu Sufyan at this time was renowned as one of the
best fighters and horsemen of the Quraysh and one of
their most accomplished poets. He used both sword and
tongue in the battle against the Prophet and his
mission. All his energies were mobilized in denouncing
Islam and persecuting the Muslims. In whatever battle
the Quraysh fought against the Prophet and whatever
torture and persecution they meted out to the Muslims
Abu Sufyan had a part to play. He composed and recited
verses attacking and vilifying the Prophet. 

For twenty years almost this rancor consumed his soul.
His three others brothers - Nawfal, Rabiah and
Abdullah, had all accepted Islam but not he. 

In the eighth year after the Hijrah, however, shortly
before the Islamic liberation of Makkah, Abu Sufyan's
position began to shift, as he explains: "When the
movement of Islam became vigorous and well-established
and news spread of the Prophet's advance to liberate
Makkah, the world caved in on me. I felt trapped.
'Where shall I go?' I asked myself. 'And with whom?'
To my wife and children, I said: 

'Get ready to leave Makkah. Muhammad's advance is
imminent. I shall certainly be killed. I shall be
given no quarter should the Muslims recognize me.' 

'Now,' replied my family, 'you must realize that Arabs
and non-Arabs have pledged their obedience to Muhammad
and accepted his religion. You are still bent on
opposing him whereas you might have been the first to
support and help him.' 

They continued trying to influence me to re-consider
my attitude to Muhammad's religion and to re-awaken in
me affection towards him. Eventually God opened my
heart to Islam. I got up and said to my servant,
Madhkur: 'Get ready a camel and a horse for us.' I
took my son Jafar with me and we galloped with great
speed towards al-Abwa between Makkah and Madinah. I
had learnt that Muhammad had camped there. As I
approached the place, I covered my face so that no one
could recognize and kill me before I could reach the
Prophet and announce my acceptance of Islam directly
to him. 

Slowly, I proceeded on foot while advance groups of
Muslims headed towards Makkah. I avoided their path
out of fear that one of the Prophet's companions would
recognize me. I continued in this fashion until the
Prophet on his mount came into my view. Coming out
into the open, I went straight up to him and uncovered
my face. He looked at me and recognized me. But, he
turned his face away. I moved to face him once again.
He avoided looking at me and again turned away his
face. This happened repeatedly. 

I had no doubt - as I stood there facing the Prophet
that he would have been pleased with my acceptance of
Islam and that his companions would have rejoiced at
his happiness. When, however, the Muslims saw the
Prophet, peace be on him, avoiding me, they too looked
at me and shunned me. Abu Bakr met me and violently
turned away. I looked at Umar ibn al-Khattab, my eyes
pleading for his compassion, but I found him even more
harsh than Abu Bakr. In fact, Umar went on to incite
one of the Ansar against me. 

'O enemy of God,' lashed out the Ansari, 'you are the
one who persecuted the Messenger of God, peace be on
him, and tortured his companions. You carried your
hostility towards the Prophet to the ends of the
earth'. 

The Ansari went on censuring me in a loud voice while
other Muslims glared at me in anger. At that point, I
saw my uncle, al-Abbas, and went to him seeking
refuge. 

'O uncle,' I said. 'I had hoped that the Prophet,
peace be on him, would be happy about my acceptance of
Islam because of my kinship to him and because of my
position of honor among my people. You know what his
reaction has been. Speak to him then on my behalf that
he may be pleased with me.' 

'No, by God,' replied my uncle. 'I shall not speak to
him at all after I have seen him turning away from you
except if an opportunity presents itself. I do honor
the Prophet, peace and blessings of God be on him, and
I stand in awe of him.' 

'O uncle, to whom then will you abandon me?' I
pleaded. 

'I do not have anything for you except what you have
heard,' he said. 

Anxiety and grief took hold of me. I saw Ali ibn Talib
soon after and spoke to him about my case. His
response was the same as that of my uncle. I went back
to my uncle and said to him: 'O uncle, if you cannot
soften the heart of the Prophet towards me, then at
least restrain that man from denouncing me and
inciting others against me.' 

'Describe him to me,' said my uncle. I described the
man to him and he said: 'That is Nuayman ibn al-Harith
an-Najjari.' He sent for Nuayman and said to him: 'O
Nuayman! Abu Sufyan is the cousin of the Prophet and
my nephew. If the Prophet is angry with him today, he
will be pleased with him another day. So leave him...'
My uncle continued trying to placate Nuayman until the
latter relented and said: 'I shall not spurn him
anymore.' 

"When the Prophet reached al-Jahfah (about four days
journey from Makkah), I sat down at the door of his
tent. My son Jafar stood beside me. As he was leaving
his tent, the Prophet saw me and averted his face.
Yet, I did not despair of seeking his pleasure.
Whenever he camped at a place, I would sit at his door
and my son Jafar would stand in front of me... I
continued in this fashion for some time. But the
situation became too much for me and I became
depressed. I said to myself: 

'By God, either the Prophet, peace be on him, shows he
is pleased with me or I shall take my son and go
wandering through the land until we die of hunger and
thirst.' 

When the Prophet came to hear of this, he relented
and, on leaving his tent, he looked more gently
towards me then before. I so much hoped that he would
smile." 

Eventually the Prophet relented and told Abu Sufyan,
"There is now no blame on you." He entrusted the
newcomer to Islam to Ali ibn Abi Talib saying: "Teach
your cousin how to perform wudu and about the Sunnah.
Then bring him back to me." When Ali returned, the
Prophet said: 

"Tell all the people that the Messenger of God is
pleased with Abu Sufyan and that they should be
pleased with him." 

Abu Sufyan continued: "The Prophet then entered Makkah
and I too entered in his entourage. He went to the
Sacred Mosque and I also went, trying my best to
remain in his presence and not separate from him on
any account... 

Later, at the Battle of Hunayn. the Arabs put together
an unprecedented force against the Prophet, peace be
on him... They were determined to deal a mortal blow
to Islam and the Muslims. 

The Prophet went out to confront them with a large
number of his companions. I went out with him and when
I saw the great throngs of mushrikin, I said: 'By God.
today, I shall atone for all my past hostility towards
the Prophet. peace be on him, and he shall certainly
see on my part what pleases God and what pleases him.'


When the two forces met, the pressure of the mushrikin
on the Muslims was severe and the Muslims began to
lose heart. Some even began to desert and terrible
defeat stared us in the face. However, the Prophet
stood firm in the thick of battle astride his mule
"Ash-Shahba" like a towering mountain, wielding his
sword and fighting for himself and those around him...
I jumped from my horse and fought beside him. God
knows that I desired martyrdom beside the Messenger of
God. My uncle, al-Abbas, took the reins of the
Prophet's mule and stood at his side. I took up my
position on the other side. With my right hand I
fended off attacks against the Prophet and with my
left I held on to my mount. 

When the Prophet saw my devastating blows on the
enemy, he asked my uncle: 'Who's this?' 'This is your
brother and cousin. Abu Sufyan ibn al-Harith. Be
pleased with him. O Messenger of God.' 

'I have done so and God has granted forgiveness to him
for all the hostility he has directed against me.' 

My heart soared with happiness. I kissed his feet in
the stirrup and wept. He turned towards me and said:
'My brother! Upon my life! Advance and strike!' 

The words of the Prophet spurred me on and we plunged
into the positions of the mushrikin until they were
routed and fled in every direction." 

After Hunayn, Abu Sufyan ibn al-Harith continued to
enjoy the good pleasure of the Prophet and the
satisfaction of being in his noble company. But he
never looked the Prophet directly in the eye nor
focussed his gaze on his face out of shame and
embarrassment for his past hostility towards him. 

Abu Sufyan continued to feel intense remorse for the
many and dark days he had spent trying to extinguish
the light of God and refusing to follow His message.
Henceforth, his days and nights he would spend
reciting the verses of the Quran. seeking to
understand and follow its laws and profit by its
admonitions. He shunned the world and its adornments
and turned to God with every fibre of his being. Once
the Prophet. peace be on him, saw him entering the
mosque and asked his wife: "Do you know who is this,
Aishah?" "No, O Messenger of God." she replied. This
is my cousin. Abu Sufyan ibn al-Harith. See, he is the
first to enter the masjid and the last to leave. His
eyes do not leave his shoelace." 

When the Prophet, peace be on him, passed away, Abu
Sufyan felt intense grief and wept bitterly. 

During the caliphate of Umar, may God be pleased with
him, Abu Sufyan felt his end drawing near. One day
people saw him in al-Baqi, the cemetery not far from
the Prophet's mosque where many Sahabah are buried. He
was digging and fashioning a grave. They were
surprised. Three days later, Abu Sufyan was lying
stretched out at home His family stood around weeping
but he said: "Do not weep for me. By God, I did not
commit any wrong since I accepted Islam." With that,
he passed away. 


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{Invite (mankind, O Muhammad ) to the Way of your Lord (i.e. Islam) with wisdom 
(i.e. with the Divine Inspiration and the Qur'an) and fair preaching, and argue 
with them in a way that is better. Truly, your Lord knows best who has gone 
astray from His Path, and He is the Best Aware of those who are guided.} 
(Holy Quran-16:125)

{And who is better in speech than he who [says: "My Lord is Allah (believes in 
His Oneness)," and then stands straight (acts upon His Order), and] invites 
(men) to Allah's (Islamic Monotheism), and does righteous deeds, and says: "I 
am one of the Muslims."} (Holy Quran-41:33)
 
The prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: "By Allah, if 
Allah guides one person by you, it is better for you than the best types of 
camels." [al-Bukhaaree, Muslim] 

The prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him)  also said, "Whoever 
calls to guidance will have a reward similar to the reward of the one who 
follows him, without the reward of either of them being lessened at all." 
[Muslim, Ahmad, Aboo Daawood, an-Nasaa'ee, at-Tirmidhee, Ibn Maajah] 
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