Assalaamu 'alaikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh,
With all due respect brother, What do you mean by 'muftis such as this have
doubtful credentials and are a nemesis'? Who made islam-qa the all authority on
giving fatawah (for all we know - Islam -qa generally follows the Hanbali
position on issues - and since not every Muslim follows the Hanabilah madhhab -
many fatawa would not apply to the bulk of Muslims) - where did the shuyukh
from islam-qa receieve their credentials from and do they have an unbroken
chain that goes back to the Salaf us Salih and to the Beloved of Allah
sallAllahu 'alaihi wa sallam (no disrespect intended to the TRUE inheritors of
the prophets)? We know that mufti's can err, and personally, we all know that
we should not be a mujahir - or one who reveals sins which Allah subhaanahu wa
ta'ala has covered up (with repentance or not).
That said, I would personally take the opinion of not revealing one's past
sins, but however i would respect the opinion which the sheikh has given
(perhaps for a certain 'urf or culture or people etc) - remember that his
training is from South Africa - not the US or Middle East or Turkey or
Australia. In Turkey, there was a custom where the mother of the groom would
have to be shown the 'blood' after the marriage consumation - right or wrong -
this was cultural - so which cultures are respected (as long as they do not
conflict with Islam - who knows?).
There are many times where muftis give verdicts (even Saudi scholars) which
seem to go against the majority, and yet we do not go bagging the sheikh.
Who made us the authority in the area of fatawa giving to disagree? If you
have the requisite knowledge, then Alhamdulillah, but if you do not, then be
quiet!
Better yet, it would be better to stop posting 'fatawa' which may apply to
one certain case or individual, instead, people seem to post fatwas all over
the net, and this causes unnecessary problems at times. Since certain fatawah
may only apply to a certain locality - not to the globe as a whole!
This is a difficult issue, and in regards to deceit, what would be the
condition of say a female who were 'bald', and kept that a secret until she was
married? Or a male who knew that he had HIV and kept that also a secret until
after the marriage and potentially harmed the other side?
What about getting tests done to see that the person does not have any STD's?
In some countries the couple to be must take these tests beforehand (a good
thing in my opinion), since it will prevent in most cases the offspring from
inheriting deadly diseases due to the sins of one or both parents.
So although at face value what the mufti has said may seem to be going
against the Sunnah - I would hardly believe that the sheikh has overlooked the
Prophetic advice on this issue (he would certinly know the issue of the mujahir
and of not revealing one's sins to others). Perhaps the issue of deceit is
greater than not revealing ones sins? Allahu 'alam - better ask him to clarify
if you have any problems rather than to do gheeybah.
Remember that if he or she (scholar) delivers a right opinion gets 2 ajr, and
if they make a mistake they still receieve one hasanaat. But us the layman? We
should use hiqmah and wisdom and take from those whom we trust - and this
sheikh is a trustworthy source - but there may be differing opinions in this
regard by other 'ulama. One fatwa can never be the outcome of people labeling
the learned as people of nemesis etc
And Allah Alone Knows Best - and we seek His Guidance and Help at all times.
Fi Amanillah
Wassalaamu 'alaikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh
Your brother in Islam
Orhan Abu Khadijah Sheriff
[EMAIL PROTECTED], [EMAIL PROTECTED] wrote:
Assalaam Alaikum w r w b
Muftis such as these have doubtful credentials and are a nemesis. They will
destroy lives and should not be approached. Br. and Sis please look for answers
in islam-qa.com or islamhelpline.com
Brother Ansar Raza is perfectly right. The prophet has clearly ordered not to
volunteer to make sins such as these known to others. He said do not to
disclose what Allah has hidden. For people in such a dilemma, keep shut but
first and foremost correct yourselves. Keep asking for firgiveness and continue
to pray to Allah swt not to disclose their sins at any point in their lives and
even after death till eternity. For this sister in particluar, be extra good to
the husband once married. Build a bond of sharing, caring and love that
inshaAllah will never be broken and only get stronger by time.
abumaryam
"Ansar Raza"@yahoo.com wrote:
Mufti Sahib's verdict is totally wrong. We commit many sins, but at the
time
or after our marriages we do not open the whole catalogues of our wrong
doings to our spouses. Allah is SATTAR and He does not like wrongdoings to
be made public unless it becomes a ZULM to somebody else. (4:148) If she has
committed such a sin of adultery, that is up to her and she should not
narrate it to her husband.
There is no guarantee that her future husband is also virgin and has not
committed any wrongdoing. Marrying a chaste man is also an honour and pride.
So does Mufti Sahib encourage men to narrate all their wrong doings to their
wives after marriage? No! It never happened. Then why a remorseful repenting
woman is bound to tell her husband about her past and become embarrassed for
the rest of her life?
What if her husband tease her for the rest of her life over such sins?
Ansar Raza
-----Original Message-----
From: [email protected] [mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED] On Behalf
Of Saba Khan
Sent: Thursday, April 19, 2007 5:41 PM
To: eGroup For Muslims Around The World
Subject: Boycott Israel [IslamCity] SHOULD I TELL MY FUTURE HUSBAND OF MY
PAST WRONG DOINGS?
My problem is that i am not a virgin and I am afraid
to tell my future husband that who ever it maybe.
Question
I am a 24 year old muslim girl who is wanting to
get married soon. I have done a lot of wrong things
in the past that I feel bad about. My problem is that
i am not a virgin and I am afraid to tell my future
husband that who ever it maybe. I'm really afraid
that i won't be wanted and I am ashamed of my
wrongdoings. I just want to start my marriage of
clean with no worries. Allah(swt) is the one who
forgives sins, so do I have to tell the person that I
marry that I am not a virgin? I am really scared and
worried. Shouldn't we ask Allah(swt) for forgiveness
and leave it at that? PLease give me some advice.
Answer
In the name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful
Assalaamu `alaykum waRahmatullahi Wabarakatoh
There are three aspects to this query:-
At the outset, you must understand that we are human
and are bound to err. We commit errors and fall prey
to Shaytaan. Rasulullah ( sallallahu alayhi wasallam )
said "every human being commits sins but the best of
sinners are those who repent". You have committed an
error and seek forgiveness for your error by Allah.
You should be sincere and remorseful over your sin and
make a firm determination never to repeat such a sin
in the future. Certainly, Allah will forgive you for
Allah says "Do not become despondent of Allah, surely
He will forgive all your sins".
If you have a marriage proposal it will be necessary
to inform the boy of your condition. Marrying a chaste
woman is an honour and pride for a man. Hiding your
condition from a potencial husband the time of the
proposal is tantamount to deceit and deception which
is Haraam (prohibited). Rasulullah ( sallallahu alayhi
wasallam ) said "whoever deceives is not from my
Ummah". You should therefore be upright and clarify
your condition. You should state that you have
repented since and you are remorseful over your error.
This attitude will protect you from many
misunderstandings that could come up in the future and
would cause a great amount of distress and trauma to
you.
You should not become depressed if your proposal is
refused. Keep your attention towards Allah, Inshallah
a suitable partner will propose.
And Allah knows best
Wassalam
Mufti Mohammad Zakariyyah Desai,
Checked and Approved by:
Mufti Ebrahim Desai
Darul Iftaa, Madrassah In'aamiyyah
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