RULES THAT GUYS WISH GIRLS KNEW 1. If you think you are fat, you probably are. Do not ask us. We refuse to answer.
2. Learn to use the toilet seat. Youre a big girl. If its up, put it down. 3. Do not cut your hair. Ever. Long hair is always more attractive than short hair. One of the big reasons guys fear getting married is that married women always cut their hair, and by then, you are stuck with her. 4. Birthdays, Valentines, and Anniversaries are not quests to see if we can find the perfect present yet again! 5. If you ask a question you dont want an answer to; expect an answer you do not want to hear. 6. Sometimes we are not thinking of you. Live with it. 7. Do not ask us what we are thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as navel lint, the shotgun formation and monster trucks. 8. Sunday = sports. Its like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be. 9. Shopping is not a sport, and no, we are never going to think of it that way. 10. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine. Really. 11. You have enough clothes, You have too many shoes. 12. Crying is blackmail. 13. Your ex-boyfriend is an idiot. 14. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work. Strong hints do not work. Obvious hints do not work. Just say it! 15. No, we do not know what day it is. Whenever will. Mark anniversaries on a calendar. Remind us frequently beforehand. 16. Most guys own three pairs of shoes topes. What makes you think wed be any good at choosing which pair, out of thirty, would look good with your dress? 17. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question. 18. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. Thats what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for. 19. Foreign films are best left to foreigners. 20. Check your oil, Please. 21. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days. 22. If you dont dress like the Victoria s Secret girls, dont expect us to act like soap opera guys. 23. If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad or angry we meant the other one. 24. Let us ogle. We are going to look anyway; its genetic. 25. Dont rub the lamp if you dont want the genie to come out. 26. You can either ask us to do something OR tell us how you want it doneboth. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself. 27. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials. 28. Christopher Columbus did not need to ask for directions, and neither do we! 29. The relationship is never going to be like it was the first two months we were going out. Get over it. And quit whining to your girlfriends - like THEIR relationship is SO MUCH better. 30. ALL men see in only 16 colours, like windows default settings. Peach for example is a fruit not a colour. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have NO idea what mauve is. 31. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that. 32. We are not mind readers and we never will be. Our lack of mind-reading ability is not proof of how little we care about you. 33. If we ask what is wrong and you say nothing, we will act as if nothings wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle. =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= * send mails to [EMAIL PROTECTED] * PLEASE do not post offensive jokes * message size limit is 150 KB * List info and instructions are available at http://harbinger.sirma.bg/lists/jokes.html and in the header of this email =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
