thanks for posting the link, Walt. I think both Sullivan and Paglia are goode xamples of homophobia internalised. as such, compassion could be a reaction after the inital anger and disgust.
I guess that i didn't really mean this sort of blatent hypocrisy either. I find it very distasteful. The hypocrisy shown in my belief system is not deliberate but rather the reslut of indoctrination in childhood-ie. on the one hand being appalled by sexism and on the other having sexist thoughts and feelings. or being anti racist yet on the other having racist reactions. When one grows up being taught types of human are 'less than' it is very difficult to undo it. But undo it we must. when for many years we see a rac of people portrayed as violent and criminal, it is imbedded in the psyche and diffiuclt o dislodge, no matter how embarrasing it is. However, the self hatred shown by Sullivan(and it seems Paglia) is entirely different. it is calculated. It is presenting one image to the public, decrying one way of living(which i detest my self, more about that later) in order to be accepted and liked. Chronic people pleasing is a sign of self hatred. Yes, how the man operates is dreadful. It is also very sad and yet another product of deeply ingrained homophobia which none of us escape, not even we homsexuals. whoich leads me onto why i detest the culture he condemns(but lives in and revels in). When i was oyung I was a part of that scene-clubbing, sex and more sex. Did I enjoy it? Sometimes but mostly no. It just increased my self loathing. What was i doing then? Looking for acceptance and love. Only I wasn't going to find it that way! How could I? When what i was doing was not about accpetance and love and I was doing with others who also were driven by the same emptiness.(This is not confined to gay people-str8's do it too and for the same reasons tho the root of the loathing is different). What i really wnated was a normal everyday life shared with one person whom I loved and accepted as is and who likewise accepted and loved me. i found that. I was lucky. It gave me the perch i needed to do the work I needed to do on myself.(ditto for my partner). Of course that work never ends, life is about growing and learning. Having said all that, i do not believe that people who act out the way Sullivan does(and the culture he condemns) are bad people, just the 'lost and lonely ones clamouring to be found'. It REALLY pisses me off that this type of behaviour is used to beat us over the head with by the homophobes. THEY are the ones who sowed the seed for ti in the first place! Thru their laws and their hatred of us, they have made it very difficlut indeed to have long term relationships, in fact in may places it is illegal, punsihable by prison or death. the EXCLUDE us at every turn, close or bar meeting places, disallow marriage,refuse to take our reltionships seriously, force us underground. so when we resort ot meeting in public loos or backrooms or dark alleys because that is all THEY have left us with, they can say 'see we told you, these people are sick'!!!!! Of course, whilst one is looking for or indulging in sex, one does not have the time to be feeling the internal pain one is experiencing. So it becomes addictive, a way of keeping the darkness at bay, a way of keeping from being annihilated. So whilst we might be disgusted at Sullivan's overt hypocrisy, we might also feel compassion and understandign for him. bw colin
