Fellow SIQUOMBites, This is too funny! Trying to keep it lite..... ET THE 2002 DARWIN AWARD
For those not familiar with the Darwin Award, it is an annual honor bestowed posthumously upon the individual who provided the universal human gene pool the biggest service by getting killed in the most extraordinarily stupid way. Competition this year was, as usual, keen, but... THE WINNER IS... Paderborn, Germany - Overzealous zookeeper Friedrich Riesfeldt fed his constipated elephant, Stefan, twenty-two doses of animal laxative and more than a bushel of berries, figs, and prunes before the plugged-up pachyderm finally let fly, in the amount of 200 pounds, and suffocated the keeper. Investigators say the ill-fated Friedrich, 46, was attempting to give the ailing elephant an olive oil enema when the relieved beast unloaded on him. "The sheer force of the elephant's unexpected defecation knocked Mr. Riesfeldt to the ground, where he struck his head on a rock and lay unconscious as the elephant continued to evacuate his bowels on top of him," said flabbergasted Paderborn Police Chief Erik Dern. "With no one there to help him, he lay under all that dung for at least an hour before a watchman came along, and during that time he suffocated. It seems to be just one of those freak accidents that happen."
