note:
yes this is long, yes this is deliberately sent to the whole list. And yes this
is going to be one of Mags' heartfelt posts , so if anyone wants out now, you
should hit that delete button now . and yes i broke the etiquette of printing
this above Hells post..sorry about that Hell. ... easier in this moment to just
write. Your post certainly has propelled me out of a sense of not knowing what
to say . You have inspired me to jump out of my silence and share some of my
thoughts.
Hell, I have also grown to love this list. I have been blessed with the love and
friendship shared with very special people around the world. It was here that my
Brian found me. It was here that I have made many, many connections with friends
who I love dearly, who have become my brothers and sisters, who have taught me
to lean, to trust, to love.
In the face of your news Hell, I feel compelled to share some of what I felt
when I joined this community a year ago. I was going through some very
difficult, trying times personally. On the edge of major changes in my life, I
needed to find "me" again. Part of the "finding me" standing up to the dragon
and saying enough. I wouldnt be controlled or hurt anymore. I needed my life
back.
So there I was in my kitchen on a glorious spring morning last April, sitting,
staring at the screen. I took a deep breath, and typed in two words "Joni
Mitchell". I decided to reconnect to the woman whose music has been much of a
life line to me through the loss of my son to many other challenges.
Understatement, it was a big deal for me to come back to Joni, back to the
garden.
I walked into a "room" filled with people who knew each other well. People from
all over the world, from so many different spaces and places in their lives
joined together to joke, tease, laugh together, touch hearts, touch souls.
Within the first week of my being here, I saw Clark create that wonderful April
Fools joke which got us all going. I heard from Jimmy and Bob and Ashara and
many many others greeting with me a warmth that I was and continue to be touched
by.
As you know, Joni didnt come to Canada on her tour last year, so I watched from
the wings. Didnt even get to see the tribute here, so I lived it through all of
you. I took in each and every post like it was some long drink of water after
my days in the desert. It was wonderful to read, in great detail, the
experiences so generously shared. And then my "Joni" collection started...a BSN
programme, tapes and tapes and more tapes! and Cds and tapes and videos and
laughter and tapes and community and.... more tapes.
There were dream stories, BSN stories, Mendel stories, love stories and every
other kind of Joni story you could ever imagine. Stories shared here got us all
going with the possibility Joni....of meeting Joni herself, of seeing Joni
herself, of sharing cigarette space with Joni herself. It did not take long at
all for me to feel that I was no longer an outsider. I felt very much at home.
I have seen us share survival stories together, some openly, some behind the
scenes. I have seen us support one another. The courage of Anne Sandstrom comes
to mind immediately. God, remember how we all responded to Asharas private post
to come together as friends and family? Ashara asked us to gather up CDs,
tshirts, hats, cards, Joni mementoes..anything to help Anne get through those
terrible, trying days of her chemo.
And Ashara. Our Ashara our angel and earth mama who is very much one of the tent
pegs that keeps us standing strong.
And then there are the countless ones who do so much for us on the sidelines.
You know who you are. Appreciation goes out to you beyond words. So many of us
do our bit to keep the wheels turning, all for the love of Joni, and each other.
I have seen and felt and heard us grieve together in the face of losing those
close to us as a community. I came on the scene here just after Wally died and I
read about how his loss was deeply felt.
I know first hand how hard it was on all of us to learn the shocking, terrible
news about Kenny last fall, only short weeks after we held him in our arms. We
shared hugs, songs, laughter and late, late hours with him at Ashara's .
Remember? Kenny knew each and ever single word of Joni's songs. Every one. And
oh how he loved us all.
Brian and I received and continue to receive support and concern and caring for
what he went through this year as he faced a triple bypass which literally saved
his life. You, this wonderful Joni community, family, friends were and continue
to be an integral part of his healing, whether you know this or not.
Only weeks later did Jack, one of our resident artists undergo the same thing,
so there was another opportunity to reach out and give support and receive the
gift of his friendship.
I even have a separate folders filled with stories shared with Brian, Joni
stories, Anne Sandstrom stories, "bypass Jack stories" , Kenny Grant stories,
all of which I read from time to time to remind me how very precious this life
is. I want to savour it all.
We support each other because we care. It is what we do. Ive seen this over and
over again here. We get excited about a gathering that is six months away
because the spirit of the last one still resounds loud and clear in our hearts.
I remember the butterflies-in-our-stomachs squealing excitement of seeing who
was on the other side of Ashara's door...the anticipation is incredible!
We support, we care, we love, we reach out, we agree, we disagree, we digress.
We allow people to come close to us for perhaps the first time ever. We let each
other in on our private lives.
I have been inspired by how much this community cares. This place has changed
lives and given a sense of hope to those in need. I have seen that time and time
again. Endless stories of compassion and concern.
You know what I am talking about. The love and caring of this community is very
real. I even felt safe enough to share stories of my own Little Green .
Hell, you have given so much to our Joni community with your humour, insight,
intelligence. You have generously shared Kiwi music. You sent a couple of tapes
which I know took a lot of time, effort and energy to put together, at no cost
to me, and you asked for nothing in return. You give out of the generosity of
your heart with a desire to share the music of your community and your life.
I was so touched as I read pages and pages that you had written on each and
every artist on the tape. You gave such wonderful insight to musicians I never
would have heard of otherwise. I appreciate so much the fact that you so
enthusiastically took the time to go into indepth explanation/description,
relaying just why you felt this way or that about an artist.
I want you to know that you will be missed. You and your wonderful humour and
all of your contributions vis a vis music, your stories about anything and
everything.
I just wanted to say how very sad I am that you have decided to unsub. I am
sorry it has come to this. I really am.
I have taken the liberty to make this very much JC because I feel it affects all
of us, the whole list.
Mags.
hell wrote:
> I joined this list for two reasons.
>
> 1. To find and share information about Joni Mitchell, my favourite
> singer/songwriter/artist/poet.
> 2. To make the acquaintance of people around the world.
>
> Since I've joined, I've achieved both those goals, and since the split into
> NJC and Joni-Only, I've discovered lots of great new music (eg. Jonatha
> Brooke), books, authors, actors, movies, etc., and I've had some wonderful
> (and intelligent) discussions on some incredibly varied subjects. I've
> loved this list and believe I've made some real friends here. It always
> seemed a place where opinions were valued, not denigrated.
>
> But recently every second post seems to be someone attacking someone else's
> opinion - and Marcel's post on Bjork, whether you liked it or not, was still
> just his opinion, expressed as he felt was his right - then it's someone
> else defending the original post, then someone else defending the opposer,
> etc., etc., etc. I'm sick and tired of wading through my daily mail, for
> the 10-20% of posts that are actually constructive. I've used my delete key
> more than the scroll key lately, which annoys me considerably.
>
> Seems like we've lost track of what we're about, and I don't think we can
> any longer claim to be "the nicest, friendliest discussion list on the
> 'net."
>
> This being the case, I'm unsubbing for a while, until people can accept that
> not every opinion will be the same as theirs, and that yes, sometimes people
> may write something that someone else finds offensive. The answer (and I've
> said it before recently, but maybe it was missed in the deluge of "I don't
> like what you said" posts) is the delete key. For God's sake, if you were
> in a room of 600 people, would you agree with and/or even like every person?
> I don't think so, so why should you expect it here!?
>
> I'll be back but it might be a while. Maybe when I return, people will have
> worked out how to be civil to each other again, and be a little more
> accepting of the fact that we're all very different, and only united by one
> thing. Joni.
>
> Helen
> ____________________________
> "To have great poets, there must be
> great audiences too." - Walt Whitman
>
> [EMAIL PROTECTED]
> Visit the NBLs (Natural Born Losers) at:
> http://www.nbls.co.nz
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