--- colin <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote:
> Howevrer, I have always found it strange, and sad,
> that whilst I hear
> parents praise their children because they do well
> at school or have become
> doctors or lawyers or a Major or whatever, I have
> NEVER heard a parent
> priase their child because they are kind, caring ,
> compassionate, tolerant,
> patient, happy, giving, etc.
My kids are not honour roll students. My daughter has
a learning disability. She finds reading extremely
difficult and basically has to memorize every word
because reading phonetically usually doesn't work for
her. She has had "communications" help since Grade
One. Nevertheless, she was judged at a par with the
rest of her classmates and in most classes, with the
exception of math, she rated at around or in some
cases above the class average. In art and music she
got in the 80s (per cent).
She graduated from Grade 8 in June and heads off for
high school in September. She won an award at the
grad ceremony as "most improved girl" (there was a
"most improved boy" too). This was a way of the
school acknowledging the fact that the kid works
really hard and is extremely conscientious, despite
the fact that she most likely will never come in first
in her class (at least, not in the academics).
However, of all the things I most admire - and I
really do admire this girl - about my daughter, what
impresses me most is her ability to figure out people.
She knows who is honest and who is full of BS. She
picks her friends well - her best friends are
excellent students (one of her friends must have won 4
or 5 awards this year) but, more important, they are
genuinely NICE kids.
When my kids were younger, it bothered the hell out of
me the way people would brag about how their little
Tiffanys and Ashleys were speaking in full sentences
at 14 months; or how they had been placed in the
"gifted" class; or how they excelled at dance or
music.
I don't care if my daughter ends up a hairdresser -
she will be a fine hairdresser and, knowing her, will
make a lot of money at it - despite her difficulties
with math, the kid can save money and I have no idea
where she got that from - not from me, that's for
sure!
My son has also had problems in school. He repeated
Grade 3 and I often regret that we agreed to do this
although, to be honest, he does seem young for his age
(he will turn 11 on Thursday - another friggin' Leo!).
He is often difficult and is a really anxious kid,
often the target of bullies, and I worry about him a
lot. But, when he's not bellyaching about something
(in this case, I think he DOES get this unfortunate
quality from me), he can be kind and sweet, and he
wouldn't hurt a fly. He too was receiving "special"
help at school but, by the end of this school year (he
just finished Grade 4), at a meeting of
parents/teachers/special ed types, we all agreed he
wouldn't need the help anymore because he's finally
getting there and can do it on his own.
All this to say, my main concern for my kids is that
they end up decent human beings who have respect for
themselves and others - the rest will follow in its
own time. And anyway, how many lawyers do we really
need in this world?
And I'm not knocking Bob either - good on ya, Bob,
that your kid is an honour student. With parents like
you and your wife, he MUST also be a fine young man of
good character.
>
> And what about all those children who are just not
> very intelligent? those
> not on the honour roll? are they to be dismissed
> because their iq is not up
> to expectation? Or what about those with other
> disadvantages? Yoiu can only
> work with you have.
> One very good reason why the so called fairness of a
> meritcracy is bullshit
> put about by those who prefer not think about those
> of lesser inteligence
> and/or abiltiy. we are not born equal no matter how
> we may kid ourselves.
> Society is geared for the haves and enables them to
> have more. The rest can
> go to hell it seems. And they do.
>
Colin, maybe you're being a bit too harsh here, but I
understand your point. Certainly it seems today that
those in political power - from what I hear and from
what I read this is a worldwide trend, at least in the
so-called "developed" countries - it seems the poor
are to blame for their own misfortune and that
*everyone* on welfare is somehow cheating the system.
>From my point of view, as someone who has worked in
gov't bureaucracy for over 20 yrs, and has seen
different political parties and types come and go, it
does seem to me that the current young generation of
political workers just don't understand the idea of
poverty at all - they seem like really nice kids on
the surface, but there's something scary about them.
They are quite demanding and just SOOO conservative to
me. (I'm talking about the political workers
affiliated with the party in power, not the average
workers). You can tell, even by the way they dress,
that they've never known what it's like to scrounge
for a meal, they didn't need to apply for student
loans to put them through their university MBA
courses, and therefore they can't even conceive of the
possibility of anyone who works hard not being able t
make it.
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