hey guys! did you know that in south africa and some other southern african countries, there is somethng similar to the dowry system, except it is called "lobola" and it is not the girl who has to give for marriage, but the guy! :) and it is usually in terms of cows! it is a custom whereby cattle is given by the "boy" to the father of the bride as a "compensation" for the "loss" of his daughter! number of cattle will depend on her "marriageability". emphasis is also sometimes placed on the education of the prospective bride. sometimes the lobola can be other types of livestock like horses, but "modern" ppl often ask for money! The money received by the bride's family is used to help the young bride set up house. Lobola is also a gesture of gratitude on the part of groom's family for looking after and bringing up the young bride.
this custom is firmly rooted in black society and so greatly valued for the protection it offers the bride. The modern usage of Lobola does not always have a happy outcome, however; there are many instances when families use Lobola to acquire money to pay their debt. Worse still, some men see women as "goods" that have been paid for. This creates a marital climate that is not conducive to trust and love. so there! dowry and lobola are part of particular cultures. i guess it is when they are not looked at wth the right attitude that they become an "evil". --- jose mathew <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote: > Hi .. u wondeful people.. it is me again... > (if any of u hav problems with me numbering the > mails > pl. tell me.. i will do something about it ok) > well i am fine here. thankx for all those mails u > sent me.. some of those mails made my eyes to be > filled with tears... > to be very honest i enjoy joy net more than ever > now. > (so those of u dont send mails to joy net start > sending now and enjoy it.. it is from my own > experience hhhhhooooo.......) > well today i thought of adding something to the > discussion going on.. i.e dowry(hope this is the > right > spelling) i am soooooo poor at spelling. so do not > get > surprised if u find some strange words) > couple of months back some of my australian friends > asked me about the indian marriages. so i hav to > explain the concept of dowry to them. it was funny > to > see the feelings on their faces.(any way latter on > some of the guys told me that they r planning to > come > to india to get married! ) > then a week latter one of my friend came to me with > a > chapter from a sociology text book, telling me > something about the dowry system, its origin etc. i > found that it was a very early primitive tribal > practice, where often it was goods not money was > given > to the boy by girls parents. also the book said > mainly > animals were used as dowry viz, cows, goat etc. > as i was reading the matter my friend out of his > total > innocence asked me how much cows will i be getting > on > the day of my marriage!!!(latter on i realised that > he > missed the point when i told the group early that it > was money not goods in India) > so my advise for u guys is that care ful when u > demand > dowry.. u may become like Krishna of Hindu mythology > > chaising the cows all your life! > > > n.b:now when u come for my mariage do not look for > cows out side the church.. Ok........ > lov u all heaps > God bless you all > jos mathew australia > Send a newsletter, share photos & files, conduct > polls, organize chat events. Visit > http://in.groups.yahoo.com > > **************************************************************** > This mail is generated from JOYnet, a Jesus Youth > mailing list. > To unsubscribe, send a mail to > [EMAIL PROTECTED] > To subscribe to this mailing list, visit > http://www.jesusyouth.org/joynet > For automatic help, send a mail to > [EMAIL PROTECTED] > In case of any issue related to the mailing list > contact > [EMAIL PROTECTED] > **************************************************************** Send your FREE holiday greetings online! http://greetings.yahoo.com **************************************************************** This mail is generated from JOYnet, a Jesus Youth mailing list. To unsubscribe, send a mail to [EMAIL PROTECTED] To subscribe to this mailing list, visit http://www.jesusyouth.org/joynet For automatic help, send a mail to [EMAIL PROTECTED] In case of any issue related to the mailing list contact [EMAIL PROTECTED] ****************************************************************
