Dear JYs Just felt like adding some smiles today ... so here goes
============================================== An old preacher was dying. He sent a message for his banker and his lawyer, both church members, to come to his home. When they arrived, they were ushered up to his bedroom. As they entered the room, the preacher held out his hands and motioned for them to sit on each side of the bed. The preacher grasped their hands, sighed contentedly, smiled, and stared at the ceiling. For a time, no one said anything. Both the banker and lawyer were touched and flattered that the preacher would ask them to be with him during his final moments. They were also puzzled; the preacher had never given them any indication that he particularly liked either of them. They both remembered his many long, uncomfortable sermons about greed, covetousness, and avaricious behavior that made them squirm in their seats. Finally, the banker said, "Preacher, why did you ask us to come?" The old preacher mustered up his strength and then said weakly, "Jesus died between two thieves, and that's how I want to go." ========================== Father O'Malley, the parish priest, was giving a sermon about charity. He said, "In our world today, some people have so much while others have so little. We must give of ourselves and our worldly goods to help the less fortunate." He said, using Tommy O'Toole, who was seated down front as an example, "If you had ten thousand pounds, wouldn't you give half of it to the poor?" Tommy nodded his head in agreement, "I would that, Father." The priest continued, "And Tommy, if you had a great wealth of jewelry, wouldn't you sell it and give half to the poor?" O'Toole replied, "Indeed I would, Father." The priest said, "And Tommy, if you had two pigs, wouldn't you give one of them to your neighbor next door?" Tommy said, "No. no, no, no." shaking his head in emphasis." The priest said, "And why not, my son?" To which O'Toole replied, "Now Father, you know I have two pigs." =========== God is like... COKE He's the real thing. BAYER ASPIRIN He works miracles. FORD He's got a better idea. HALLMARK CARDS He cares enough to send His very best. TIDE He gets the stains out that others leave behind. GENERAL ELECTRIC He brings good things to life. SEARS He has everything. ALKA-SELTZER Try him, you'll like Him. SCOTCH TAPE You can't see him, but you know He's there. DELTA He's ready when you are. ALLSTATE You're in good hands with Him. VO-5 Hair Spray He holds through all kinds of weather. DIAL SOAP Aren't you glad you have Him? Don't you wish everybody did? U.S. POST OFFICE Neither rain, nor snow, nor sleet nor ice will keep Him from performing his rounds. =================== ----------------------------------------------------- This mail is generated from http://www.jesusyouth.org To subscribe to this mailing list send a mail to [EMAIL PROTECTED] To unsubscribe from the list send a mail to [EMAIL PROTECTED] -----------------------------------------------------
