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====> LABLaughsClean
=====> http://www.LABLaughs.com
======> Another F-R-E-E mailing from LABLaughs.com

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INTRODUCTION

Greetings to all.

It isn't what you have, or who you are, or where you are, or
 what you are doing that makes you happy or unhappy. It is
 what you think about." 
-Dale Carnegie

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QUICK JOKE

A lawyer sent an overdue bill to a client. A note 
was attached that stated: "This bill is one year old." 

By return mail the lawyer had his bill back. To it was
 attached a card which read: "Happy Birthday."

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CARTOON TIME

YOUR FEELING

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Crazy Drivers

As a senior citizen was driving down the freeway,
 his car phone rang. Answering, he heard his wife's
 voice urgently warning him, "Herman, I just heard
 on the news that there's a car going the wrong 
way on Highway 401. Please be careful!"
"Darnl," said Herman, "It's not just one car. It's hundreds
 of them!"

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A LIFESAVER

Little Noah came into the house with a new harmonica.
 "Grandpa, do you mind if I play this in here?" 

"Of course not, Noah. I love music. In fact, when your
 grandma and I were young, music saved my life." 

"What happened?" "Well, it was during the famous Johnstown
 flood. The dam broke and when the water hit out house it
 knocked it right off the foundation. Grandma got on the
 dining room table and floated out safely." 

"How about you?" "Me? I accompanied her on the piano!"

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THE COW

An elementary school teacher, it is said, received this
 report from one of her young students: 
The bird I am going to write about is the Owl. 

The Owl cannot see at all by day and at night is as blind as
 a bat. 

I do not know much about the Owl, so I will go on to the
 beast which I have chosen to write about. It is the Cow. 

The Cow is a mammal. It has six sides: right, left, upper,
 and below. At the back it has a tail on which hangs a brush.
 With this it sends the flies away so they do not fall into
 the milk. 

The head is for the purpose of growing horns and also so
 there will be someplace for the mouth to go. The horns are
 to butt with, and the mouth is to moo with. 

Underneath the Cow hangs the milk. It is arranged for
 milking. When people milk, the milk comes, and it never
 runs out. How the Cow does this I do not know, but it is
 true.

The Cow has an excellent sense of smell. It can be smelled
 from far away. This is the reason why there is lots of
 fresh air in the country. 

The Man Cow is called the Ox. The Ox is not a mammal.
 
The Cow does not eat much, but what it eats it eats twice,
 so it will get enough to eat. When a Cow is hungry, it
 moos. When it is quiet, it is because its inside is all
 filled up with grass. 

The Cow usually sleeps all night, so it never sees the Owl.
 I haven't seen one, either. But I have seen a Cow.

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wish to reproduce material, then permission is granted, a
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Don't forget to visit our site at http://www.LABLaughs.com

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