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====> LABLaughsClean
=====> http://www.LABLaughs.com
======> Another F-R-E-E mailing from LABLaughs.com

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<><><><><><><><> 'PLEASE VISIT OUR SPONSOR' <><><><><><><><>

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INTRODUCTION

Enjoy Your Days!

"Don't stay in bed, unless you can make money in bed." 

- George Burns (1896-1996)

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QUICK JOKE

Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his 
sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning?

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CARTOON TIME

COFFEE ADDICTION

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BUSINESS OVER PHONE!

Joe grew up in a small town, then moved away to attend 
college and law school. He decided to come back to the small 
town because he could be a big man in this small town. He 
really wanted to impress everyone. He opened his new law 
office, but business was very slow at first. 

One day, he saw a man coming up the sidewalk to his office. 
He decided to make a big impression on this new client when 
he arrived. As the man came to the door, Joe picked up the 
phone. He motioned the man in, all the while saying, "No. 
Absolutely not. You tell those clowns in New York that I 
won't settle this case for less than $1 million. Yes. The 
appeals court has agreed to hear that case next week. I'll 
be handling the primary argument, and the other members of
my team will provide support. Okay. Tell the DA that I'll 
meet with him next week to discuss the details." 

This sort of thing went on for almost five minutes. All the 
while, the man sat patiently as Joe rattled instructions. 
Finally, Joe put down the phone and turned to the man. 

"I'm sorry for the delay," he said, "but as you can see, 
I'm very busy. What can I do for you?" 

The man replied, "I'm from the phone company. I came to 
hook up your phone.

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<><><><><><><><> 'PLEASE VISIT OUR SPONSOR' <><><><><><><><>

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PAINTING YELLOW STRIPES

A blonde was hired to paint the yellow stripes on a highway. 
The first day, she painted ten miles of road. The second 
day, she only painted five. Her boss, seeing how she was 
getting slower, decided to give her a day off, thinking that 
she needed a rest. 

When she came back the next day, she only painted 0.5 miles 
of road. 

Her now discouraged boss came up to her and said, "Excuse 
me, but why have you been painting less and less each day, 
even after I gave you a day off?" 

"Simple," the blonde answered. "I've been getting farther 
away from the paint can!"

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<><><><><><><><> 'PLEASE VISIT OUR SPONSOR' <><><><><><><><>

How To Stop Worrying (About Diabetes) And Start Living!

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ARE YOU KIDDING?

Reaching the end of a job interview, the Human Resources 
Person asked a young Engineer fresh out of MIT, "And what 
starting salary were you looking for?" 

The Engineer said, "In the neighborhood of $125,000 a year, 
depending on the benefits package." 

The interviewer said, "Well, what would you say to a package 
of 5 weeks vacation, 14 paid holidays, full medical and 
dental, a company matching retirement fund for 50% of your 
salary, and a company car leased every 2 years -- say, a 
red Corvette?" 

The Engineer sat up straight and said, "Wow! Are you 
kidding?" 

And the interviewer replied, "Yeah, but you started it."

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<><><><><><><><> 'PLEASE VISIT OUR SPONSOR' <><><><><><><><>

Be your own boss!!! Unlimited income potential. 
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We claim no copyrights to the material in our mailing lists,
if you do Forward it then please leave it intact. If you
wish to reproduce material, then permission is granted, a
link and credit would be nice but is in no way required.

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Please feel free to send us any feedback or comments about
this, or any other LABLaughs Service. We aim to please. Just
send mailto: [EMAIL PROTECTED] and we'll try to please you!

Don't forget to visit our site at http://www.LABLaughs.com

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