The Guardian: Irish police are being handicapped in a search for a stolen
van, because they cannot issue a description. It's a Special Branch vehicle
and they don't want the public to know what it looks like.

Sunday Times: A rival newspaper has stated that eight out of every ten
people are useless at their jobs. How do we know that this story was written
accurateky by one of the two out of ten workers who know what they are
doing?

Daily Telegraph/Daily Mail: When Doris How, 82, hurt her leg in a Tesco
supermarket in Hertford, a bag of frozen peas was used to ease the pain.
Afterwards she discovered that the store had charged her 78 pence for the
peas. Tesco later apologised and sent her a basket of fruit and a potted
plant.

Daily Telegraph: Daily food budget per person on a submarine - 2 pounds.
Daily food budget for a guard dog at a naval base - 3.5 pounds.

Sunday Telegraph: For Bush's stay at Buckingham Palace, the Queen was not
willing to countenance 'bomb and airborne assault-proofing' of her London
home. "Her Majesty's view was that since there are going to be 5,000 British
policemen involved in the security operation, it is not unreasonable to
expect guests to have some faith in their abilities."

The Times: In a survey which asked people to choose which characters best
represented loyalty Winston Churchill beat the Queen to the top spot. Tony
Blair scored less highly than Lassie, Jess (Postman Pat's cat), Skippy the
Bush Kangaroo and Mr Darcy from 'Pride and Prejudice'.

The Times: Road safety signs were erected by Sheffield council workmen
warning motorists of a school ahead in Bradfield village, South Yorkshire.
The school closed down 18 years ago.

Independent on Sunday: Plans to stage Britain's first frozen turkey bowling
championships at Manchester ice rink were abandoned after objections from
animal rights campaigners. Plastic birds were used instead.

Daily Telegraph: Four International rally drivers were banned from driving
after being caught in speed traps during the British leg of the 2002 World
Rally Championships. They were among 17 rally drivers caught by the roadside
cameras, apparently set up to trap spectators following the rally cars.

Daily Mail: Receiving a Christmas card with a robin on it is a sign of
something nasty to come according to the Penguin Guide 'The Superstititions
of Britain and Ireland'. But wearing a spider in a bag around your neck
until the spider dies will bring good luck.

Jean in Poole

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