WOMAN'S PERFECT BREAKFAST

She's sitting at the table with her gourmet coffee.
Her son is on the cover of the Wheaties box.
Her daughter is on the cover of Business Week.
Her boyfriend is on the cover of Playgirl.
And her husband is on the back of the milk carton.

(for non us indoctrinated persons - milk carton ads are for missing
persons)
+++++


WOMEN'S REVENGE

"Cash, check or charge?" I asked, after folding items the woman wished
to purchase. As she fumbled for her wallet I noticed a remote control
for a television set in her purse. "So, do you always carry your TV
remote?" I asked. "No," she replied, "but my husband refused to come
shopping with me, so I figured this was the most legal evil thing I
could do to him."

+++++


UNDERSTANDING WOMEN (A MAN'S PERSPECTIVE)
 I know I'm not going to understand women. I'll never understand how you can
take boiling hot wax, pour it onto your upper thigh, rip the hair out by the
root, and
still be afraid of a spider.

+++++



CIGARETTES AND TAMPONS
A man walks into a pharmacy and wanders up and down the aisles. The sales girl
notices him and asks him if she can help him. He answers that he is looking
for a box of tampons for his wife. She directs him down the correct aisle. A
few minutes later, he deposits a huge bag of cotton balls and a ball of string
on the counter.
 She says, confused, "Sir, I thought you were looking for some tampons for
your wife?

He answers, " You see, it's like this, yesterday, I sent my wife to the
store to get me a carton of cigarettes, and she came back with a tin of
tobacco and some rolling papers; cause it's sooooooooooo much cheaper.
So, I figure if I have to roll my own ............ so does she.

[One must assume that this guy is the one on the milk carton] :)

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