There were 20 of them, but I deleted the ones I knew I'd seen before
Sue
5. A man walks into a bar with a slab of asphalt under his arm and
says:
"A beer please, and one for the road."
6. Two cannibals are eating a clown.
One says to the other: "Does this taste funny to you?"
7. Patient: "Doc, I can't stop singing 'The Green, Green Grass of Home'"
Doctor: "That sounds like Tom Jones Syndrome."
Patient: "Is it common?"
Doctor: "Well, 'It's Not Unusual'"
10. Deja Moo: The feeling that you've heard this bull before.
11. I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day but I
couldn't find any.
13. I went to a seafood disco last week... and pulled a mussel.
15. Two fish swim into a concrete wall.
The one turns to the other and says "Dam!".
16. Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, so they lit a fire
in the craft. Unsurprisingly it sank, proving again that you can't
have your kayak and heat it too.
17. A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were
standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After
about an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to
disperse. "But why," they asked, as they moved off. "Because", he said, "I
can't stand chess-nuts boasting in an open foyer."
18. A woman has twins and gives them up for adoption. One of them
goes to a family in Egypt and is named "Ahmal." The other goes to a
family in
Spain; they name him "Juan."Years later, Juan sends a picture of himself
to his birth
mother. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wishes
she also had a
picture of Ahmal.
Her husband responds, "They're twins! If you've seen Juan, you've seen
Ahmal."
19. Mahatma Gandhi, as you know, walked barefoot most of the time, which
produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet. He also ate very
little, which made him rather frail and with his odd diet, he suffered
from bad breath. This made him ..(Oh, man, this is so bad, it's good)...
A super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.
To unsubscribe send email to [EMAIL PROTECTED] containing the line:
unsubscribe lace-chat [EMAIL PROTECTED] For help, write to
[EMAIL PROTECTED]
