>> >>Grandma in the Courtroom >> >> >>Lawyers should never ask a Mississippi grandma >>a question if they >>aren't prepared for the answer. >> >>In a trial, a Southern small-town prosecuting >>attorney called his >>first witness, a grandmotherly, elderly woman to >>the stand. >>He approached her and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you >>know me?" >> >>She responded , "Why, yes, I do know you, Mr. >>Williams. I've >>known you since you were a young boy, and frankly, >>you've been a big disappointment to me. You lie, >>you cheat >>on your wife, and you manipulate people and talk >>about them >>behind their backs. You think you're a big shot >>when you >>haven't the brains to realize you never will >>amount to anything >>more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know >>you." >> >>The lawyer was stunned! Not knowing what else to >>do, he pointed >>across the room and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you >>know the defense attorney?" >>She again replied, "Why, yes, I do. I've known >>Mr. Bradley since >>he was a youngster, too. He's lazy, bigoted, and >>he has a >>drinking problem. He can't build a normal >>relationship with anyone and >>his law practice is one of the worst in the entire >>state. Not to >>mention he cheated on his wife with three different >>women. One of them >>was your wife. Yes, I know him." >> >>The defense attorney almost died. The judge >>asked both >>counselors to approach the bench and, in a very >>quiet voice, >>said, "If either of you idiots asks her if she >>knows me, >>I'll send you to the electric chair."
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