Love these, received by DH from a couple of US friends!
(1)
Unconfirmed reports from several states indicate WalMart has largely sold
out of firearms and ammunition in many of its stores in the last week. One
witnessed report indicated one customer attributes the move on guns and
ammunition to recent events in Georgia: "The Russians may have invaded
Georgia, but they sure as hell won't repeat it anywhere else."
(2)
"The state of Alabama has declared martial law after learning that Georgia
has been invaded by Russia. "We'd always figured the commies would come up
through Florida with the immigrants," said one Alabama resident. Alabama
citizens are entering their bomb shelters in preparation for Russian air
strikes. Alabama state police encountered immediate obstacles when they
could not locate Ossetia anywhere in Georgia.
The entire country is in an outrage. Estimates claim that over 1,500
Georgians are dead, most of whom at least look white. Senators and House
members immediately interrupted their vacations to address the sudden
slaughter of human beings. Thousands of dollars have already been donated to
"Rebuilding Atlanta" and protests are being planned along the Tennessee
border."
Jean in Poole, Dorset, UK
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