Pardew has the experience of being sacked that we’re looking for,
insists Mike Ashley
Alan Pardew Newcastle Manager
Newcastle’s search for a manager with good experience of being sacked is
nearing a conclusion after it was revealed that Alan Pardew will take
over as boss in the next 24 hours with a view to being sacked at the end
of the season following a successful relegation.
The former Reading, West Ham, Charlton and Southampton boss was among
the favourites to take over, and it is believed that he was chosen in
favour of Martin Jol who didn’t possess the required record of dismal
failure that the Newcastle owner is thought to be looking for.
Pardew was sacked by League One club Southampton earlier this season
amid increasing speculation amongst supporters of the South coast club
that he was a shit manager, with all the motivational qualities of a
yeast infection.
This speculation is believed to have alerted Ashley, who was becoming
increasingly concerned at the good job that Chris Hughton was doing,
with the 5-1 win over fierce rivals Sunderland prompting him to review
the manager’s position.
Chairman Ashley told reporters, “Alan is just the sort of manager that I
want at this club.”
“I wanted someone that would leave the Newcastle fans open-mouthed with
disbelief. Someone that they wouldn’t have even considered a possibility
for the manager’s position. Someone who will really get the fans going
and set the place alight.”
“I believe appointing Alan will do all of those things and so much more.”
Newcastle fans have been quick to agree with Ashley’s assessment, with
one telling us, ”I’m speechless, tell me this isn’t true!”
“Right, I’m going to Ashley’s place to set fire to the fat prick!”
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MARCHING ON TOGETHER
