from one of my illiterate mates in Bristol:
Liverpool sign a new striker from Nigeria. On the first day of training Kenny Daglish picks up the ball & says, "Ball." Then he does a kicking motion & says, "Kick." He then points to the goal." "Gooooaal! understand?" Nigerian says, "Excuse me, I speak perfect English Mr Daglish." Daglish says, "Sit down son, I'm talking to Andy Carroll."
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