I was clearing out some old stuff from my mailbox and found this that was posted to the list a couple of years ago .. oh how we comiserated .. look at Reading now...
On 27 August 2010 15:34, Tim Leslie <[email protected]> wrote: > From a Reading supporting mate of mine ... and we thought we had it bad!!! > > > It is a truly warped mind which can't rest after a defeat in the Carling > Cup, but after an abortive attempt at sleep I find myself turning Ben > Hamer's goalkeeping over in my head as well as apparently more pressing > concerns about needing a new boiler and pending appraisals with my team at > work ("you've put here 'strengths - accounting'. That's your job though, > isn't it?"). > > Quite why I thought that watching Reading play would improve another dire > day spent at work after battling across Berkshire on First Great Western's > tardy and expensive service, dodging lycra-clad oxf*rd with fold up > bicycles > in the vestibules is beyond me. At least at Reading I can tell everyone in > no uncertain terms what I think of their wretched performance as opposed to > work where I spend the best part of 8 hours a day keeping my tongue. And > now > the more I think about it, the more things trouble me, for instance: > > - Why did I spend £350-odd on a season ticket to commit to watching Alex > Pearce slice desperate clearances at 45 degree angles to his kicking foot > and Jem Karacan donate the football to the opposition as if they were > collecting sports equipment for flood-ravaged Pakistan? It's not as if I > didn't already know back in the summer that these two - and a good many > others on our books - are pretty absymal at football. It should be about £4 > to get in to watch a football match really, tops. I blame Liverpool fans > and > Northern Rock. > > - Why do we have a failed ex-Slough and Woking manager in charge? Don't get > me wrong, I like Brian. He's quite clearly a thoroughly bloody nice bloke > which is at least an improvement on his predecessor. > > - Why is our best player Icelandic? Iceland is to football what, erm, Bejam > is to Cricket. > > - Why is my own personal favourite player - also Icelandic - a 34-year old > who is slower than a mini-bus full of Chelsea fans with a flat tyre? Are we > otherwise so devoid of quality and excitement that watching a man > apparently > made from granite smash foolhardily into the opposition is the most > entertaining thing on offer? > > - Why do I hate Adam Federici? Is it because he is seemingly the only > Australian who is crap at sport? Or because every post-match > mistake-denying > interview is delivered in that chirpy accent after he has spaffed a couple > of low, near-post dollies under his fat belly? > > - When will Brian Howard ever make a tackle? He likes a physical challenge > about as much as Walter the Softy does. > > - Why is it a £3.50 return fare from Reading station to go and watch this > sh*t? What am I getting for my money, a film showing en route? You f*cking > crooks. > > - Why (when we have the spackiest, most simperingly middle-class fan base > in > the land) do we have probably the jobsworthiest stewards in the entire > country, who themselves are dictated to by an ex-fireman with a speech > impediment? And why don't the stewards make themselves a little more > jobsworthy outside the ground rather than erecting a safety fence to keep > 250 gibbering Scunthorpe fans at bay and sending the home supporters off to > walk all the way round the ground to get to their cars parked at a bargain > £7 in Worton Grange. > > - Why is it only at football that £7 for 2 hours parking is deemed an > acceptable price? At least Dick Turpin wore a mask. > > - Why do I have to mind my p's and q's at football anyway? F*ck me, there > are 8,000 empty seats most weeks; can't we sit all the kids in families in > some sort of enclave with a sound-proof safety fence? At football, people > shouldn't be thrown out for swearing, they should be ejected for doing the > EA-SAY clap or for wearing face-paint or a jester's hat; these things are > far more offensive. > > - Why does modern football disenfranchise me so? Preening Premier League > fancy-dans getting paid far too much and taking themselves too seriously. > Sadly, in the Championship we seem to see the second-tier of this kind of > c*nt which in a way is worse. SKY Sports News in HD bringing you the news > that Barnsley have banned Vuvuzelas for next season. I hope all 92 league > clubs go bankrupt, yes including Reading. It's all your fault, Jimmy Hill. > > - Why, after 30 years trying, haven't I been able to find a more fulfilling > hobby than watching a crap football team on a far too regular basis? Yes, > there is another choice of hobby of course, but much more of that kind of > thing and it'll fall off in my hand. > > Oh well, at least this has stopped me thinking about the boiler for 5 > minutes. And I suppose the biggest WHY here is WHY did I bother writing all > this when I hold at least 90% in massive contempt anyhow. > > > > Follow-up: > > Beautifully put, Floyd. > > This and more is precisely why I no longer watch Reading. Nearly thirty > years of season ticket attendance and away games, and for all the reasons > you've stated and many more, I couldn't give a flying f*ck if I never see > another 'professional' football match again. > > Every time I'm drawn back for any reason, I feel almost sick. However, the > game now has the fans it deserves. A set of true idiots whose idolisation > of > 'players' as they watch them flounce around in silk or get on and off > air-conditioned coaches wearing earphones while sulking borders on > cretinism. > > I can just about stomach an away game watching Reading now, preferably in > London, so you can disappear and do something else completely removed from > football or even pretend you hadn't gone to the game at all, or somewhere > distant and shabby in the North, so that one sense of abject misery might > outdo the other. Either occasion doused in alcohol so not much of it all > filters in. > > Each time I remember the days of my football youth it seems that the game > was at the very least reflective of a more mature society and life. Players > were men, and looked like men. Now they are either metrosexual or so far up > their arses and financially cushioned and protected you'd think they were > mincing Berlin pouves. Fans were ribald, great fun and were held in some > regard, if not respect. Now it's a crock of manufactured and over-priced > sh*t. > > The dearth of talent on the pitch is in direct comparison to the steroid > world of money perpetuated by the behemoths of 'entertainment' such as Sky > and is only a step away from the same gibbering mentality of sh*t like the > X-Factor, a true emblem of how infantilised and f*cking weak-minded the > general populace of this blighted country has become. > > The money men know this and love the 'new audience' with its desire for > enforced drama, play-offs, phone-ins, and laugh at all those that still > fork > out the best part or more of thirty quid to get into a plastic, homogenous > sh*t-house of a stadium that was always previously called a ground, knowing > what simple-minded, consumer fodder they are. The fact that these idiots > compound that with paying the rest of the exorbitant rip-off that goes with > it either confirms they are truly thick, or like the preening faggots who > ply their trade as footballers these days, they've just got too much money. > > The same goes for Sky, who have single-handedly ruined the game in this > country with money. Their executives will, I am pretty certain, rub their > hands and laugh at the thick wad of proles who sign up to their 'services' > gated on to the back of the lure of watching 'footy' from your armchair > listening to barely literate mongols try to string sentences together about > 'games' taking place in places that now resemble outdoor equivalents of > 'Gladiators', whose sponge-handed audience used to have an average age of > five, which is about the average mental age of the modern day football fan. > Going to the Madejski resembles an open-day at Fairmile. > > I look at players now and know that a lot of them remind me of the wannabe > rock stars in John Niven's wonderful book about the music industry 'Kill > Your Friends'. If some of today's pampered footballing nonces weren't > earning sums of money that make them supremely rich in obscenely short > spaces of time they'd be back on the estates breaking into cars or selling > crack or running in gangs. > > Everything about modern football is wrong. Everything. Not just a little > bit. I don't buy the 'benefits for the younger fan or family' bit. What was > once a passionate and brilliant sport played out in thrilling, slightly > dangerous arenas is now an 'experience' leached of meaning of any kind at > all. It's absolute, utter garbage and I do not miss it one iota at all. > > I used to love my club and I used to love the 'sport' of football. But it > truly does not exist, just as the rest don't any more. They sold > themselves, > whored themselves out and became what whores are, badly dressed, far too > expensive for what they are, soul-less plastic voids to spunk your money > on. > > The people who run football now have no perception or conception of what > once made the sport as a professional spectacle great. None. And they never > will have. It is f*cked, forever, and always will be. > > Stick your jester hat up your rectum, football, is what I say. > > Anyway Floyd, you are right on every count. Post of the millennium (cue > Gladiators post-goal music and rhythmic stands-based dancing by sixteen > thousand spastics). I'm glad a night's sleep didn't soften your ire. > > > > > > > _______________________________________________ > Leedslist mailing list > Info and options: > http://mailman-new.greennet.org.uk/mailman/listinfo/leedslist > To unsubscribe, email [email protected] > > MARCHING ON TOGETHER > _______________________________________________ Leedslist mailing list Info and options: http://mailman.greennet.org.uk/mailman/listinfo/leedslist To unsubscribe, email [email protected] PETE CASS (1962 - 2011) Rest In Peace Mate
