Here is the latest installment of the ever-popular (not quite true actually, "ever-totally-ignored" would be more accurate, but anyway)........
Fly on the Wall At The FA Disciplinary Commission, Pt 94. Lord Dunning: Zzzzzzzzzzz Flunky: Er..........wake up, your Lordship. LD: Wha- oh yes, yes, so where were we? Excellent lunch, I have to say, and that port was jolly good. Jolly good. Now then, what are we here for? Flunky: It's a Disciplinary Commission, my Lord. LD: Ah OK, so what happened? Flunky: Well, if you watch this footage, you can see this player, er.........well the other team complained about it, er...........he, well, he made a rude face at another player. LD: WHAT???!!! You've dragged me all the way in from Buckinghamshire for that?! Mind you, it was an excellent lunch. Case dismissed. Now, where's that bottle of port? Flunky: One moment, my Lord. If you look at the shirt which the criminal is wearing............ LD: Ah. Oh yes, I see. Absolutely. Well it's a clear case of racial abuse. Monkey gestures. They don't like them these days, do they? So the dark chappie from the other team complained did he? Well, I don't blame him. Flunky: Well actually the other player is white, my Lord, but........ LD: No matter. Clear case of racial abuse. ban him for life, I say. Flunky: Er, I'm not sure you can actually ban him for *life *my Lord. LD: Can't I? Harumph. Well let's ban him for, how many games? Have a look at the fixture list and see if Leeds are playing against any of our favourite clubs early in the season. Flunky: Well actually, my Lord, this Alioski doesn't play for Leeds any more. LD: What? Flunky: No his contract has run out and he's believed to be about to sign for a club in Turkey. LD: Turkey? Weren't they those nice people who gave me that lovely villa by the sea for a month to help me remember to vote for Istanbul as the venue for the Champions League Final? Flunky: Ahem, yes my Lord, but remember we're not supposed to talk about that. LD: Ah yes, well. Anyway, lovely people those Turks. So this - what;s his name again? Flunky: Alioski, my Lord. LD: .........he's off to Turkey is he? Well good luck to him, I say. Flunky: So the penalty will be..........? LD: What penalty? Flunky: For the disciplinary infraction. LD: Oh that? What poppycock. Case dismissed. Can we fine Leeds United a few million though? Flunky: Unfortunately, my Lord, I don't think we can. LD: Bah! Where's the port? _______________________________________________ Leedslist mailing list Info and options: https://mailman.gn.apc.org/mailman/listinfo/leedslist To unsubscribe, email [email protected] Find us on Facebook https://www.facebook.com/groups/leedslist/ Rest in Peace Guy, and wear your hat!
