On Fri, 2 Aug 2002, Official Flamer/Cabal NON-Leader wrote:

> There was a shindig today. It was attended by a community of misfits and
> elderly geeks, some pushing the wrong side of 35, obviously well past
> their "use by" date.

there was a gathering today. It was attended by a group of over
100 unrelated inDUHviduals of all ages (14-45 would be my guess).

> It was opened by a weirdly coiffure'd person speaking about Elvis, of
> all things. Elvis, obviously, has significant timing problems, since his
> frequency has been administratively increased from 100 appearances per
> alien abductee to 1024. Which is, nevertheless, progress.

it was opened by gilad ben yosef (the next generation) who found some
obscure excuse to involve Elvis with embedded linux systems - in an
attempt to persuade his listeners that embedded linux is gapping the
strangled desktop PC business from every direction - in an increasing
rate. according to the applause in the end - everybody agreed with that
claim.

> Then a person with a very variegated taste in shirts spoke to the
> assembled about parasitic insects' victims which send each other letters.
> Thus, Host A send Host B something (and, sometimes, vice versa) which
> Host C, for some ineffable reason, wants to hijack. While highly
> unlikely, since rarely do hosts hijackanything, unless they are
> hostesses, of course, in which case they are likely to catch something
> and not hijack, barring Muslim gentlemen with rudimentary flight
> training, in which case they are hijacked and do no hijack themselves
> which, basically, means tha.... Never mind.

then aviram jenik took over, and tried showing people how insecure their
secure connections realy are - this attracted quite a few questions from
the crowd, ranging from "i know the server is protected by a firewall, and
i connect from my remote PC - is there software to protect my PC from
being broken into (the answer, surprisingly, was "use a firewall on the
PC"), to "i telnet to a machine. is it realy that insecure?". some
questions were more advanced - and there were quite a few of those.

> There were no loo breaks so all suffered distended bladders.

due to hickups in the organization, time flew by (time goes faster, when
you move slow ;)  ), so the proper solution was chosen - skip the break!
a short protest, and some recalculation, suddenly brought a 10-minute
break into existance. the 2nd break was shortened to 10 minutes (from the
originally planned 20), and thus bad infections were prevented.

> Then came a film in which a whole collection of aging communist hippies
> lashed out at Microsoft, denigrating the glorious company's contribution
> to world culture, technology and, incidentally, to quite a few
> Congressmen and Senators. These representatives of the drug taking,
> stuttering, unwashing, oversexed, under-stratified and otherwise anti-
> American elements lauded a damned foreigner's method of playing
> Solitaire! The attack on our culture is intensifying, mein komaraden!

then came a film, in which about 70-80% of the time there were 'talking
heads'. Some heads looked quite familiar, such as the linux head, the RMS
head, the clown head...

> After the film ended, there was a signing of some form of Satanic
> contracts in the cafeteria and finally a drunken binge!

after the film ended, a bunch of the said group of inDUHviduals took over
the cinematheque's cafeteria, in order to hold a PGP signing ritual. after
that, people started spreading around, many went home, and many took over
a near-by restaurant, fighting with the waiters in order to connect tables
in a large 'L' shape - well, this _is_ a Linux users group...

> I, of course, can say nothing of the stubby monkey whichclimbed the
> stage and, instead of singing the Anthem, declaimed something in an
> unhuman language, waves his arms a bit and climbed off. Who the fuck was
> he?

ah - but i can. one of the attending inDUHviduals was asked, 15 minutes
before the event begun, to carry the opening 5-minutes keynote speech. To
this challenge he responded by speaking in a language no one(*) understood
- and which sounded like a mix between german and latin. That inDUHvidual
looked suspiciously similar to the former reporter.

> Your Reporter

this last phrase is in english...

-- 
guy

"For world domination - press 1,
 or dial 0, and please hold, for the creator." -- nob o. dy


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