On 14-Oct-05, at 5:23 PM, [EMAIL PROTECTED] wrote:
<x-tad-bigger>In a message dated 10/14/2005 2:45:05 PM Eastern Daylight Time, [EMAIL PROTECTED] writes:</x-tad-bigger>
<x-tad-bigger>hj: Then there is intelligence. (Only guessing.) Only intelligence can</x-tad-bigger>
<x-tad-bigger>> oust the separate 'feeler'. If intelligence displaces the separate</x-tad-bigger>
<x-tad-bigger>> observer, feelings are free to negotiate the state of what is. The</x-tad-bigger>
<x-tad-bigger>> energy of thought and feeling is set free. Freedom is intelligence.</x-tad-bigger>
<x-tad-bigger>> Is love. Is beauty. All that which knowledge can't touch, though</x-tad-bigger>
<x-tad-bigger>> we do have words for it. Every language has those words. Good</x-tad-bigger>
<x-tad-bigger>> words only if we leave them undefined.</x-tad-bigger>
<x-tad-bigger>> mark: yes, this separation is the prison, the</x-tad-bigger>
<x-tad-bigger>> deep insensitivity, the misery, the immense destructivity.</x-tad-bigger>
<x-tad-bigger>> And so in the ending of separation the</x-tad-bigger>
<x-tad-bigger>> immense energy of living is set free,</x-tad-bigger>
<x-tad-bigger>> energy that is manifested as/in feelings, sensations,</x-tad-bigger>
<x-tad-bigger>> thinking and non-thinking, the immense energy that is</x-tad-bigger>
<x-tad-bigger>> intelligence. It is all one. It isn't that intelligence can</x-tad-bigger>
<x-tad-bigger>> somehow come first, can come before freedom, for</x-tad-bigger>
<x-tad-bigger>> as you say, freedom is intelligence.</x-tad-bigger>
<x-tad-bigger>> </x-tad-bigger>
<x-tad-bigger>> our work then is in the awakening of intelligence,</x-tad-bigger>
<x-tad-bigger>> the awakening of pure feeling, pure sensation, pure</x-tad-bigger>
<x-tad-bigger>> thinking, pure silence. It is the awakening to</x-tad-bigger>
<x-tad-bigger>> all that is and the illusion of all that "I" am. </x-tad-bigger>
<x-tad-bigger>></x-tad-bigger>
<x-tad-bigger>hj: I'm not sure that we can actually awaken that kind of intelligence.</x-tad-bigger>
<x-tad-bigger>It is not ours and it not inside us. Perhaps we need to awaken to our</x-tad-bigger>
<x-tad-bigger>inner poverty of mind, our mediocrity, our failings in generosity and</x-tad-bigger>
<x-tad-bigger>humanity. To see how short we fall of the destiny of our DNA. How</x-tad-bigger>
<x-tad-bigger>crippled we scamper through life, shameful embarrassed - not</x-tad-bigger>
<x-tad-bigger>shameful enough to explode the fearful choices we've made in life.</x-tad-bigger>
<x-tad-bigger>Or so it seems to me.</x-tad-bigger>
<x-tad-bigger>mark: Yes, the awakening of intelligence is not something that</x-tad-bigger>
<x-tad-bigger>"I" can do. It is not in my control, not a matter of effort or</x-tad-bigger>
<x-tad-bigger>will or suppression. indeed, that is the very antithesis to the</x-tad-bigger>
<x-tad-bigger>energy of intelligence.</x-tad-bigger>
<x-tad-bigger> </x-tad-bigger>
<x-tad-bigger>yet, the awakening of intelligence is something that</x-tad-bigger>
<x-tad-bigger>requires real work, serious work, passionate work.</x-tad-bigger>
<x-tad-bigger>It is the work of self-observing.</x-tad-bigger>
<x-tad-bigger> Most importantly, to observe the nature of the obstacles,</x-tad-bigger>
<x-tad-bigger> the process of destruction, of deadening, to see the facts of what</x-tad-bigger>
<x-tad-bigger>we are doing each day to desensitize the mind, the heart</x-tad-bigger>
<x-tad-bigger> and the body.</x-tad-bigger>
hj: That seems pretty much right. We need to awaken to the horror of our lives,
to the meaninglessness, to our stubborn persistence in silly habits, to the perverse
comfort we take in illusions and self-deception. Over the last several months I have
in my writings here itemized my battle with various physical addictions. To some
effects: My pot habit is pretty much on the wane, my coffee habit is something I'm just
debating with myself. It is not my aim to defeat these habits, but to corner them, to
confront them, to challenge them. If the outcome is a healthier way of life, I'll gratefully
accept that. But I can anticipate much tougher battles. I'm aware of certain psychological
barriers that I have accepted in the past. Barriers that I have myself erected under the
psychological stress of my childhood. These neuroses will be much tougher to challenge.
Again, it would be absurd to lay down a better path. The better path if it comes will be the
result of a better understanding of my self. New neural pathways will have to be forged.
Not from some blueprint, but from the explosion of certain rationalizations or illusions
that I have built into my life. Lack of energy need not be a problem I think. For each habit
contains some deadened energy waiting to be released. How to release that - not how -
I can hear k say. But: to release that energy is the work of our tortured souls. The promise
is enormous. Not some gain, but the freedom from constraint. Self-imposed constraint.
It's a false promise only if I see it as a promise. It's not the reward, the expectation of the
reward, that will move me, but only the ending of a conspiracy inherent in my conditioning.
If it should so happen. Any expectation will drain the energy that is required for the job.
