Hi!

I guess this is more of a "social literacy" question...

I've been musing the past few days about an article by Laura Sessions
Stepp (who wrote the excellent book on young adolescents, "Our Last Best
Shot") that appeared in the Washington Post and was entitled "Why adults
can't say 'no'." You can find it at:
http://tinyurl.com/23h2to

Part of what Ms. Stepp seems to be saying is that, while as parents and
teachers we want kids to develop the strength of character to say "no" to
obviously poor influences, like peers encouraging substance abuse for
example, we don't so much want them to say "no" to us. Kids learn, then,
that saying "no" is a highly risky proposition, even though it is
undeniably the healthy thing to say in the right circumstances, and as a
result perhaps "no" doesn't get said as often as it should, even into
adult life.

So actually, I have two questions.

First, how good are you all at saying "no" and what makes it possible to
do so when you do so?

Second, how do our schools handle the notion of teaching kids how and when
to say "no" - if we do at all? For that matter, should we even be teaching
kids how and when to say "no"?

Just a few musings on a snowy Thursday evening...

Take care,
Bill Ivey
Stoneleigh-Burnham School


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