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>>New Element Discovered............. Administratium
>>A major research institution has recently announced the
discovery
>>of the
>>heaviest element yet known to science. This new element has
been
>>tentatively
>>named "Administratium." Administratium has 1 neutron,12
assistant
>>neutrons,
>>75 deputy neutrons, and 111 assistant deputy neutrons, giving
it an
>>atomic
>>mass of 312.
>>
>>These 312 particles are held together by a force called
morons,
>>which are
>>surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called
>>peons. Since
>>Administratium has no electrons, it is inert. However, it can
be
>>detected
>>as
>>it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact. A
>>minute amount
>>of Administratium causes one reaction to take over 4 days to
>>complete when
>>it would normally take less than a second.
>>
>>Administratium has a normal half-life of 3 years; it does not
decay
>>but
>>instead undergoes a reorganization in which a portion of the
>>assistant
>>neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places. In fact,
>>Administratium's
>>mass
>>will actually increase over time, since each reorganization
causes
>>some
>>morons to become neutrons, forming isodopes.
>>
>>This characteristic of moron-promotion leads some scientists
to
>>speculate
>>that Administratium is formed whenever morons reach a certain
>>quantity in
>>concentration. This hypothetical quantity is referred to as
>>"Critical Morass."
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