Fw: Junk Humour to end another week

[Don Mac Lean]

> > > > > >From Mum Here In Newfoundland > > > > > > > > Dear Son; > > > > > > > > I am writing this slow because you can't read fast. > > > > > > > > We don't live where we did when you left. Your dad read in the paper > > that > > > > most car accidents happen within 20 miles of home - so we moved. I > can't > > > > send the address as the last family that lived here took the numbers > > with > > > > them for their next house, so they wouldn't have to change their > > address. > > > > > > > > This place has a washing machine. But the first day I put 4 shirts in > > it, > > > > pulled the chain and I haven't seen them since. > > > > > > > > It rained here only twice last week - three days the first time and > four > > > > the second time. > > > > > > > > About the coat you wanted me to send you, Aunt Sue said it would be a > > > > little heavy to send in the mail with them heavy buttons, so we cut > them > > > > off. I put them in the pockets. > > > > > > > > We got a bill from the Funeral Home, it said that if we didn't make > the > > > > last payment on Grandma's funeral, up she comes! > > > > > > > > About your sister, she had a baby this morning. I haven't found out > > wether > > > > it is a girl or a boy so I don't know if you're an Aunt or an Uncle. > > > > > > > > Your Uncle John fell in the whiskey vat - some men tried to pull him > > out, > > > > but he fought them off and drowned. We cremated him, he burned for > three > > > > days. > > > > > > > > Three of your friends went off the bridge in a pickup. One was driving > > and > > > > the other two were in the back. The driver got out, he rolled down the > > > > window and swam to safety. The other two drowned - they couldn't get > the > > > > tailgate open! > > > > > > > > Aunt Mabel is knitting you some socks. She would have sent by now, but > I > > > > told her you had grown another foot since she saw you last, so she had > > to > > > > knit another one. > > > > > > > > No more news for now. > > > > > > > > Love > > > > Mum > > > > >   --- Outgoing mail is certified Virus Free. Checked by AVG anti-virus system (http://www.grisoft.com). Version: 6.0.520 / Virus Database: 318 - Release Date: 18/09/2003