-- 
-Time flies like the wind. Fruit flies like a banana. Stranger things have -
-happened but none stranger than this. Does your driver's license say Organ
-Donor?Black holes are where God divided by zero. Listen to me! We are all-
-individuals! What if this weren't a hypothetical question? [EMAIL PROTECTED]

From: Stephen Reppucci <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
Subject: the relationship thing

I never have quite figured out why the sexual urges of men & women differ
so much. And I never have figured out the whole Mars & Venus thing. And, I
never have figured out why men think with their head and women with their
heart. And, I never yet have figured out how the sexual desire gene gets
thrown into a state of turmoil, when it hears the words "I do".

One evening last week, my wife and I were getting into bed. Well, the
passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says "I don't feel like it,
I just want you to hold me." I said, "WHAT??"

So she says the words that I and every husband on the planet dreads. She
explains that I must not be in tune with her emotional needs as a Woman."

I finally realize that nothing is going to happen that night, so I went to
sleep. The very next day we went shopping at a big named department
store...I walked around while she tried on three very expensive outfits.
She couldn't decide which one to take, so I told her to take all three of
them.  She then tells me that she wants matching shoes worth $200 each to
which I say OK. And then we go to the Jewelry Dept. where she gets a set
of diamond earrings. Let me tell you ....she was so excited. She must have
thought that I was one wave short of a shipwreck, but I don't think she
cared. I think she was testing me when she asked for a tennis bracelet
because she doesn't even play tennis. I threw her for a loop when I told
her that it was OK.

She was almost sexually excited from all of this when she said, "I'm ready
to go, let's go to the cash register." I could hardly contain myself when
I blurted out, "No, honey. I don't feel like buying all this stuff now.

You should have seen her face .... it went completely blank. I then said,
"Really honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while." And just
when she had this look like! she was going to kill me, I added, "You must

not be in tune with my financial needs as a Man."

I figure that I should be having sex again sometime during the spring thaw
of 2005.

Thank you for your time.


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