I'm becoming an olde coot.
1) Distinguished

2) Duffer

3) Codger

4) Geezer 
5) Coot
Fred Moir.Lynn MA.Diesel preferred.

> Date: Fri, 11 Sep 2015 22:25:42 -0400
> To: mercedes@okiebenz.com
> Subject: [MBZ] God's plan for aging
> From: mercedes@okiebenz.com
> CC: arche...@embarqmail.com
> 
> Gerry wrote:
> Someone mentioned that there are several of us geezers on the list (those 
> over about 75 years) in a somewhat critical tone. Younger people (those under 
> 65) do find us geezers; with our various deficiencies; threatening or 
> disturbing. Just so they can understand why we have these unique habits, here 
> are explanations of why the Creator designed us this way:  
> 
> > > God's plan for aging
> > > Most seniors never get enough exercise. In His wisdom God decreed that 
> > > seniors become forgetful so they would have to search for their 
> > > glasses, keys and other things thus doing more walking. And God looked 
> > > down and saw that it was good.
> > > Then God saw there was another need. In His wisdom He made seniors 
> > > lose coordination so they would drop things requiring them to bend, 
> > > reach & stretch. And God looked down and saw that it was good.
> > > Then God considered the function of bladders and decided seniors would 
> > > have additional calls of nature requiring more trips to the bathroom, 
> > > thus providing more exercise. God looked down and saw that it was good.
> > > So if you find as you age, you are getting up and down more, remember 
> > > it’s God’s will. It is all in your best interest even though you 
> > > mutter under your breath.
> 
> > > Nine Important Facts To Remember As We Grow Older
> > > #9 Death is the number 1 killer in the world.
> > > #8 Life is sexually transmitted.
> > > #7 Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.
> > > #6 Men have 2 motivations: hunger and hanky panky, and they can't tell 
> > > them apart. If you see a gleam in his eyes, make him a sandwich.
> > > #5 Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day. Teach a person to 
> > > use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks, months, maybe 
> > > years.
> > > #4 Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in the 
> > > hospital, dying of nothing.
> > > #3 All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no 
> > > attention to criticism.
> > > #2 In the 60's, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the 
> > > world is weird, and people take Prozac to make it normal.
> > > #1 Life is like a jar of jalapeno peppers. What you do today may be a 
> > > burning issue tomorrow.
> 
> 
> We geezers allow for the shortsightedness of youth (those under 65) who 
> assiduously ignore the fact that in a few short years they will be geezers 
> too.
> Gerry
> 
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