Having finished going over the story I can now make a meaningful comment beyond typos and tech pointers.

An excellent story Hallan. I liked the flow and the way you kept weaving in things that had happen in the past as well as glimpses of what might happen in the future. There was enough rise and fall in the early part of the piece to keep the reader engaged. When you got to the meat of the story you pulled us in with both person vs nature and person vs person themes.

I was a bit surprised by certain parts after the group got split but that added to the story as it came to a close. I'm not quite sure to make of Drift's berserker action at the end but again it worked.

A very nice piece and certainly one that will offer much more as you connect the thread you've shown in it in future stories.

Kamau


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