Woods: April 1st
I was taking a break from walking, sitting on a
stump. My legs were throbbing from carrying the
extra weight of my soaking wet dress. My tail
rubbed against the backside of the stump. I
could feel every splinter and crack in the wood dragging against my underside.
"I've never really thought about what the back
of a chair feels like." I mumbled. "You don't
really until you have a tail. Now I've got to
sit in chairs with holes in them or stick my
tail up my ass." I laughed. "I'm going completely insane."
The sun had risen more but it was still the
morning. I wanted water in the worst of ways.
"Will I enjoy being a lizard?" My claws dug into
the fabric of my dress. "I...I assume no but...but I-
-snap- My head jerked up.
You will totally love being a lizard and having
that tail. It's the natural order of things. ;-)
Berl held his knife in his right hand. His arms
shook too hard for him to raise the knife.
Before him stood a lizard man, back turned to Berl.Â
"I...I could take him home as a trophy...I
could..." He swallowed. The Hunt Leader's words rang out in his head.
'You are only to kill if your life is in danger.'
"Okay I won't kill him...I can take something
from him as a trophy." Berl swallowed. He tapped
the knife against his stomach just to verify he
was still holding it. "I can. I can do that. I-"
Berl stepped on a branch that broke with a loud crack. The lizard spun around.
I do feel sorry for Berl, no question there.
The hunter was dressed in leather armor and a
cloak. He looked like Brightleaf but more so. He
was holding a knife though, that's what got my
attention. I gripped the hatchet against my side.
'Oh my gods I'm going to die. I'm going to die
and he's going to kill me. I'm so scared...' I
closed my eyes...and I saw someone. I saw Sir Egland from the other night.
"I was more than scared." Sir Egland said, "I
was petrified. I was cursed, everyone in the
outside world thinks I'm dead, and I'm trapped
in a strange city. But I'm still here."
'Sir Egland...he was scared but he didn't show
it. He kept going.' I opened my eyes and studied
the knife-wielder. He was young, as young as I
was. He looked even more scared. I could see his
fingers trembling and his bottom lip shaking.
Incidentally these were details I'd have missed a month prior.
'Sir Egland survived by being brave...' My mind
began to whirl through ideas, 'Maybe I can get
through this by being brave.' I steadied myself.
I couldn't shake, I couldn't whimper and I couldn't let a tear out.Â
I like how James remembers what Egland said right
here; his attempt not to let his fear show seems to almost work right.
"I mean what is wrong? It's obviously not just
James. You said you were a knight; you've fought
in battles before. Last night with arrows
sailing around us you barely reacted." Misha
gestured at him. "Now you're shaking. You're anxious." Nemo moved on.
The trees were identical tangles of gray with
splashes of color, orange, white, pink and
yellow. The ground was littered with dead
leaves, shrubs, brambles and the occasional tree
root. Nemo focused on these instead of the fox asking questions.
"I...Yes there is something more at play than
just James being lost." Nemo swallowed. "But it
is a personal matter of no concern to you." Misha shook his head.
"Don't let it affect you." Misha said.
"I'm not trying to let it affect me." Nemo said,
breaking off a branch from a tree. "But I know
that James is lost and scared. If we don't find
him, he'll end up killing himself. And we-
"Help!" The two snapped around.
"That's James" Nemo said. The two took off running towards the voice.
His past, the change coming on him, etc.... all that is on his mind too.
"Who is that!?" Berlitz screamed, pointing his
knife at me. I gripped the hatchet.
"Pu-put that down." I stammered. "I'm warning
you." Berlitz arms were shaking but now his eyes
were wide. He was starting to freak out. Sir
Egland would be calm, he survived. I want to
survive. I tried my best to remain calm. "I don't want to hurt you."
"You're a monster! You want to kill me!" He spit
with fear, "All you Keepers, you're monsters!
You want to kill us all!" I was taken aback. "All monsters!"
"I'm not a monster." I yelled back as my anger
flared up in me. "I'm just a guy who wants to go
home!" Now it was his turn to look surprised. "I just want to go home!"
Berlitz began panting. I saw him tense up a
moment before he leapt at me. That's probably
why I'm still alive. I leapt, or at least fell,
to the right as Berl slammed into the mud.
I flipped onto my back just in time for Berl to
jump on me. He slashed with a blind frenzy,
quite literally his eyes were closed. A few
glancing blows cut me but not deep. I punched
Berl in the face, knocking him off.
"Owe gods my nose." Berl rubbed at the fresh
flowing blood. I leapt up and took off running,
only for Berl to jump me again.Â
"Gah!" The two of us crashed into the ground. I
scratched at him in desperation, but that did
nothing. Berl prepared to stab me in the chest.
I grabbed at something, anything and threw it in Berl's face.
He dropped the knife and yelled as dirt struck
him in the eyes. He rubbed at his eyes, trying
to clear them. I grabbed my hatchet off the
ground as Berl stopped rubbing. His eyes connected with mine.
"You won't get me!" Berl's hands grabbed my
throat and started choking me. My lungs burned.
'I can't-I can't breathe!' He looked so happy
strangling me, shaking my head up and down. 'I-I
have to-' I swung the hatchet up.
Thunk.
"Oh gods." The hands around my throat went limp.
"Oh gods no." I scooted away from Berl, sitting
up. "No no no." Berl sat up on his knees,
swaying from side to side. I could only hear him
gasping for air, and the sound of my heart
hammering. "Please, please don't..." Blood
flowed from his head. From the hatchet I had swung in the side of his head.
"Please don't be dead." I whispered. Berl's eyes
filled with sorrow looking at me. He tried
mouthing something. "No, no you're alright."
Berl started to fall back. "You have to be!" I
grabbed for Berl's shirt, but his body fell outside of my grasp.Â
'No no please no.' I grabbed Berl and pulled him
against me. All of my anger was gone as the
realization settled over me. "Help! Please someone help!"
"James!" Nemo and Misha came bounding out of the
woods. I was still screaming I think and trying to stop the bleeding.
Yes I held him. I held that boy until he died in my arms.
I am reminded of the scene in "Where the Red Fern
Grows" when the bully gets killed with his own
axe when trying to kill the dog. I cannot help
but feel sorry for Berl. I would be holding him and crying just like James.
May He bless you and keep you in His grace and love,
Charles Matthias
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