Last night was the 25th annual presentation of the Golden
Raspberry Awards -- or Razzies -- and, once again, Genny
and I were present.
Below is a press release, with all the winners listed. But
let me give you some of the highlights.
Being a major anniversary for them, rather than being in an
overcrowded hotel ballroom, as they frequently are, this
year the Razzies were held in the Ivar Theatre in Hollywood.
Despite the larger venue -- probably double the size of most
years' sites -- dozens of people were turned away.
The show started -- as usual -- with a musical number. This
year it was "Lame", sung to the tune of "Fame", and served
to describe what typical Razzie winners are.
The show is always cheeky, with most of the humor coming
during the announcements of nominees in each category
from a reading of some of the most scathing review quotes
imaginable for each nominated film (all given with citations
of their sources).
Very rarely do "winners" show up to collect their awards. I
can only recall two instances. The first was Paul Verhoeven.
He came in 1996 to accept for Showgirls and made a
delightful and self-mocking speech. He accepted two
awards. In 2002, Tom Green showed up to accept for
Freddie Got Fingered. He accepted quite a few. Being
Tom Green, he started out mildly amusing (but only mildly)
and quickly went to boring and then annoying. And then
Really Annoying. To the point that, at the end of the evening,
he wouldn't get off the stage and several members of the
cast had to drag him off. (Speaking to one of the cast after
that show, when we ran into them in a restaurant, this was
not planned nor rehearsed. They really couldn't get him to
leave. And they were about to go into overtime and have to
pay a hefty penalty for the theater, which had another show
coming in. So they were determined to get him off, no
matter what it took.)
But last night's show was different. First, one of the writers
of Catwoman was in the audience and came on stage to
accept the award for Worst Screenplay. The applause
(and astonishment) for his being there was so loud, I'm not
sure which writer it was. I could make out his first name but,
there being two writers in the credits named John, I'm not
sure if he was John Brancato or John Rogers. I think the
former. He started out by joking "You know, they can't all
be Hotel Friggin' Rwanda" and went on to thank the 27 other
writers who worked on the screenplay many of whom, he
said, were smart enough not to put their names on the thing.
He also thanked his accountant, who had let him know about
some financial crisis that made his participation mandatory.
Later in the evening, Julie Newmar, the original Catwoman
on the 1960s TV version of Batman, came on stage to
accept the Worst Picture award (to Catwoman) "on behalf
of the producers". I don't think the producers actually sent
her. She gave an amusing, if disjointed, acceptance
speech, including surprise that she's never been invited
before. She went on to mention some of her performances
that might have elicited a Razzie win.
But the highlight of the evening, bringing the audience to its
feet, was when John Wilson, founder of the Razzies and a
member of the award show cast, announced that the award
for Worst Actress (Halle Berry, in Catwoman) was being
accepted by Halle Berry.
He pointed offstage, into the wings, and the audience didn't
know what to expect. The writer is one thing but... There
was a pause and we were kind of expecting one of the
show cast -- probably Chip Dornell, the Black male cast
member -- to come on stage in a wig and costume to do
some kind of parody.
But, holy crap, it really was Halle Berry.
She gave a great speech.
She came out carrying her Oscar, took the Golden
Raspberry Award in her other hand, and gave the opening
few moments of her breathless, shocked Oscar speech.
And then went into remarks for us. I can't remember
everything she said but, among them, she thanked Warner
Bros. for putting her into "a piece of crap movie". She
thanked her manager, who she brought out on stage, and
told him, next time he recommends she do a picture, he
should read the script and not just the number of zeroes
after the one. She admitted that her acting in it was terrible
and, in a parody of frequent award show comments, said
that acting as bad as hers was doesn't happen in a vacuum.
It required bad acting from dozens of other actors. And she
brought on stage an actor named Alex Borstein who
appeared in Catwoman with her. They did a bit with
Borstein (who is female) staring at Berry's very visible
cleavage while she spoke.
Berry culminated her speech by saying that, when she was
young, her mother gave her some advice which can be
summed up as "If you can't accept criticism, you aren't
worthy of praise; if you can't lose gracefully, you don't
deserve to win." Berry talked about how she started out in
beauty pagents and she won the first three pagents she
entered. Her fourth pagent was Miss USA and it came
down to her and "this gorgeous, buxom blonde". Berry knew
she wasn't going to win. And, sure enough, the blonde was
the winner. In her mind, she knew her mother's advice. She
should think kindly of the winner. But, deep down, she "just
wanted to bitch slap that girl's face". She continued: "And I
just want to bitch slap all of your faces but," she took a deep
breath, "No. I remember my mother's advice. I'll accept this
award gratefully and hope I never see you people again."
And with that, she walked back into the wings to a standing
ovation. The speech was in no way bitter and she, several
times, blamed herself for what she did. She also said that,
"if I ever get another acting job," now the Oscar winner
pressure is off her, so she's glad for this.
A truly funny and classy speech.
(I don't know if it was actually her manager on stage with her
-- I think it probably was -- but it was definitely Alex Borstein.)
There was, as usual, a ton of press there so you'll probably
see a lot of coverage today from the show. Especially with
Halle Berry having been there.
Craig.
For Immediate Release
Halle�s Feline Fiasco CATWOMAN and President�s
FAHRENHEIT Blunders Tie for 25th RAZZIE Dis-Honors
Halle Berry�s berry bad CATWOMAN and several political
figures, including President George W. Bush dominated
Hollywood�s Least-Coveted Trophy ceremonies as
�winners� of The Gala 25th Annual RAZZIE Awards were
announced the now-traditional 24 hours BEFORE That
Other Award Show: 7:30pm/PST Saturday, February 26 at
the historic Ivar Theatre in Hollywood.
Opening with the splashy production number �Lame!� (sung
to the tune of 1980�s Oscar winning Best Song �Fame�) this
year�s RAZZIE show was a 90-minute parody of award
shows in general and the Academy Awards in particular.
Complete with presenters in tuxedoes and evening gowns,
bitingly vicious real critics� quotes on each of the nominees
and � if history is any indication � NONE of the expected
�winners� within a mile of the hall, The Silver Anniversary of
the Golden Raspberry Awards proved to be a memorable
comic evening.
In addition to Worst Picture and Halle Berry as Worst
Actress, CATWOMAN also took spray-painted gold as
Worst Director (A single-named French auteur-of-the-awful
called �Pitof�) and Worst Screenplay. Nipping at
CATWOMAN�s heels, and also �winning� four trophies, was
Michael Moore�s Bush-bashing documentary FAHRENHEIT
9/11. RAZZIE Foundation members chose to do some
Bush-bashing of their own, dis-honoring the current
President with Awards for Worst Performance by an Actor
in a Leading Role and, paired with either Condoleeza Rice
or His Pet Goat, as the year�s Worst Screen Couple. Both
supporting RAZZIES also went to FAHRENHEIT, with
Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld swiping Worst
Supporting Actor and Bubble-Headed Bubble-Gum Pop
Princess Britney Spears getting her second Worst statuette
for a brief but hilarious clip in which she espouses blind faith
in Bush�s policies while loudly popping chewing gum and
wearing an obvious (and slightly askew) blonde wig atop
her head. And California�s current governor Ah-Nuld
Schwarzenegger finally �won� a Golden Raspberry as Worst
RAZZIE �Loser� of The First 25 Years � eligibility for which
was determined by having amassed the most nominations
over the years without previously �winning� a statuette.
There were also categories dis-honoring The Worst
Comedy, Drama and Musical of the Last 25 Years, as well
as Worst Remake or Sequel of 2004. A complete list of
�winners� is included with this press release.
The Gala 25th Annual RAZZIES celebrated both the
Awards� having reached the quarter century mark, and the
publication of Foundation founder John Wilson�s new book,
THE OFFICIAL RAZZIE MOVIE GUIDE. �Winners� were
determined by mailing ballots to about 675 film
professionals, film journalists and film fans from 40 U.S.
states and 15 foreign countries. The RAZZIE Award itself is
an intentionally cheapjack tchotchke featuring a golf-ball-
sized, handcrafted RAZZberry atop a mangled Super 8 film
reel that�s spray-painted gold. It has an estimated street
value of $4.97.
Gala 25th Annual Golden Raspberry (RAZZIE) Award �Winners�
WORST PICTURE
CATWOMAN (Warner Bros.)
WORST ACTOR IN A LEADING ROLE
George W. Bush / FAHRENHEIT 9/11
WORST ACTRESS IN A LEADING ROLE
Halle Berry / CATWOMAN
WORST SUPPORTING ACTOR
Donald Rumsfeld / FAHRENHEIT 9/11
WORST SUPPORTING ACTRESS
Britney Spears / FAHRENHEIT 9/11
WORST SCREEN COUPLE
George W. Bush & EITHER Condoleeza Rice OR His Pet Goat / FAHRENHEIT 9/11
WORST REMAKE OR SEQUEL
SCOOBY DOO 2: MONSTERS UNLEASHED (Warner Bros.)
WORST DIRECTOR
�Pitof� / CATWOMAN
WORST SCREENPLAY
CATWOMAN Written by Theresa Rebeck and John Brancato & Michael Ferris and
John Rogers
WORST �MUSICAL� of Our First 25 YEARS
FROM JUSTIN TO KELLY* (2003 / Nominated for 8 Awards, �winner� of 1)
WORST �COMEDY� of Our First 25 YEARS
GIGLI* (2003 / Nominated for 9 Awards, �winner� of 6)
WORST �DRAMA� of Our First 25 YEARS
BATTLEFIELD EARTH* (2000 / Nominated for 9 Awards, �winner� of 7)
WORST RAZZIE LOSER of Our First 25 YEARS
Dis-Honoring The Performer Who�s Amassed the MOST Nominations
w/out �Winning� a RAZZIE
Ah-Nuld Schwarzenegger (With 8 Nominations, including one for 2004)
�WINS� per PICTURE:
CATWOMAN = 4 Worst Picture, Actress, Director & Screenplay
FAHRENHEIT 9/11 = 4 Worst Actor, Supporting Actor, Supporting Actress
& Screen Couple
BATTLEFIELD EARTH, FROM JUSTIN TO KELLY, GIGLI, SCOOBY DOO 2 = 1 Each
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Craig Miller Wolfmill Entertainment [EMAIL PROTECTED]
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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