Here is something to chuckle about.  

Sincerely,
Mr. Fountainhead


“Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs”

An industrious young woman neglects to charge for her housekeeping services and 
is rightly exploited for her naïveté. She dies without ever having sought her 
own happiness as the highest moral aim. I did not finish watching this movie, 
finding it impossible to sympathize with the main character. —No stars.


“Bambi”

The biggest and the strongest are the fittest to rule. This is the way things 
have always been. —Four stars.

“Old Yeller”

A farm animal ceases to be useful and is disposed of humanely. A valuable 
lesson for children. —Four stars.

“Lady and the Tramp”

A ridiculous movie. What could a restaurant owner possibly have to gain by 
giving away a perfectly good meal to dogs, when he could sell it at a 
reasonable price to human beings? A dog cannot pay for spaghetti, and payment 
is the only honest way to express appreciation for value. —One star.

“101 Dalmatians”

A wealthy woman attempts to do her impoverished school friend Anita a favor by 
purchasing some of her many dogs and putting them to sensible use. Her 
generosity is repulsed at every turn, and Anita foolishly and irresponsibly 
begins acquiring even more animals, none of which are used to make a practical 
winter coat. Altruism is pointless. So are dogs. A cat is a far more sensible 
pet. A cat is objectively valuable. —No stars.

“Mary Poppins”

A woman takes a job with a wealthy family without asking for money in exchange 
for her services. An absurd premise. Later, her employer leaves a lucrative 
career in banking in order to play a children’s game. —No stars.

“Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory”

An excellent movie. The obviously unfit individuals are winnowed out through a 
series of entrepreneurial tests and, in the end, an enterprising young boy 
receives a factory. I believe more movies should be made about enterprising 
young boys who are given factories. —Three and a half stars. (Half a star off 
for the grandparents, who are sponging off the labor of Charlie and his mother. 
If Grandpa Joe can dance, Grandpa Joe can work.)

“How The Grinch Stole Christmas”

Taxation is also a form of theft. In a truly free society, citizens should pay 
only as much as they are willing for the services they require. —Three stars.

“Charlotte’s Web”

A farmer allows sentimental drawings by a bug to prevail over economic 
necessity and refuses to value his prize pig, Wilbur, by processing and selling 
him on the open market. Presumably, the pig still dies eventually, only without 
profiting his owners. The farmer’s daughter, Fern, learns nothing except how to 
become an unsuccessful farmer. There is a rat in this movie. I quite liked the 
rat. He knew how to extract value from his environment. —Two stars.

“The Muppets Take Manhattan”

This movie was a disappointment. The Muppets do not take Manhattan at all. They 
merely visit it. —No stars.

“Beauty and the Beast”

A young woman rejects a financially independent hunter in favor of an 
unemployed nobleman who lives off of the labor of others. Also, there are no 
trains in this movie. I did like the talking clock, who attempted to take pride 
in his work despite constant attacks on his dignity by the candlestick. The 
candlestick did not take his job seriously. —Two stars.

“The Little Mermaid”

A young woman achieves all of her goals. She finds an object of value—in this 
case, a broad-chested brunet man—and sacrifices as much as she believes 
necessary (the ocean, talking, etc.) in order to acquire him. —Four stars.

“Babe”

Another pig farmer fails to do his job. —No stars.

“Toy Story”

At last, a full-length feature about the inherent value of possessions. —Four 
stars.

“Garfield”

I liked this movie. Cats are inherently valuable animals. It makes sense that 
there should be a movie about a cat. I could demonstrate the objective value of 
a cat, if I wanted to. —Four stars.

“Up”

A man refuses to sell his home to serve the convenience of others, which is his 
right as an American citizen. He meets a dog, which neither finds food for him 
nor protects him from danger. He would have been better off with a cat. There 
are no cats in this movie. —Two stars.

“Frozen”

An exceptional woman foolishly allows her mooching family members to keep her 
from ruling a kingdom of ice in perfect solitude. She is forced to use her 
unique powers to provide free entertainment for peasants, without compensation. 
I liked the snowman, when he sang. —One star.



Kirby McDaniel
[email protected]

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