> Marsha:
> > And what doesn't kill you makes you stronger. :-)
>
>SA: True, but I also think about how much I open my
>writings to others in certain 'forums' due to I don't
>want to get caught up in putting too much creative
>effort into something and take it away from creative
>pursuits that I want to finish in other ways. Thus,
>the balancing act I mentioned. For instance, when I
>was writing years ago, I disappeared from seeing
>friends for what ended up being months. Then I was
>finished, came out, and they all wondered where I'd
>been. I didn't realize how much time had passed. It
>takes quite a lot of energy to write, and I don't want
>to stray too far from certain priorities.
I can understand how writing might require a separation between your
own projects and discussions on this forum. I left my friends, and
actually chased some away to paint. It was necessary. And I have
been so involved in understanding something on this forum, morality
(good&evil, for example) that I couldn't paint. But there have also
been discussions and ideas that are incorporated into the
paintings. You wouldn't see them, but they are there. Painting and
writing are separate activities, while forum discussions and creative
writing are both at their base 'writing'. One could pull energy away
from the other. Personally, I love your 'woods, woods, woods', and
miss it when it is absent.
>This has to
>do with talking about writing, that I've mentioned to
>you before, in which I felt talking about writing
>wasn't doing the writing - thus, writing too much in
>certain places isn't doing the writing in other
>places.
I talk about painting after I finish painting, or while I'm
painting. It's a way of grounding. Floating off into
never-never-land is something I do freely, but I need to ground
occasionally. I try to stick to the painting thread so not to be too
disruptive. When *I realized* 'all is analogy', purposefully
surrendering to the mythos seemed a necessary part of
living/painting. Writing about writing could pull away precious
writing energy. It's good to be aware.
>Writing is such a bone marrow experience for
>me, much the same as walking in the woods.
Bone marrow experiences are a calling.
> If I walk
>too far without filling back up on creativity, where I
>find to be sourced in experience, and thus, I don't
>involve myself in enough in an overall experience of
>events and begin to get trapped in intellectualizing
>too much, then I've found out many years ago (before I
>was on this forum) that my creativity dims. When that
>happens then I must leave the pencil and paper for a
>bit to get myself back into the overall experience of
>life in general and then my spirit isn't as drained
>and my creativity comes back again.
Life in general? Oh yes, you have a family and responsibilities. I
am without such things. That's why that tiger is so important too
me. As much as I miss things, my experience has been that those
things prevent what it takes for me to paint. Maybe that was then
and this is now. But... Responsibility and intellectualizing can
inhibit. Or expand. We build our own cages.
>Marsha:
> > I like your bridge musing. Very much! There a
> > quiet kind of
> > tension, a suspense, because I don't know what will
> > happen next. It's interesting.
>
>SA: Thank you Marsha for the compliment and feedback.
> What I liked about the story was it wasn't just about
>me.
What a strange thing. Me/not me? If
everything-is-connected-to-everything? That's something that puzzles
me about Buddhism? If the Universe is a net-of-jewels why would it
be incorrect to write about me. It just should have no more weight
than any other reflection. I am you. You are me.
>This is why I try to not discuss humans in my
>stories at times to appeal and leave open a freedom
>and thus, a space where anybody can inject their own
>ways of understanding what might be in the story. I
>find children stories to be fascinating in this
>manner, such as 'Franklin' or 'Little Bear'. Children
>stories are myth-like, if not myth all the way through
>at times. A child's imagination can stir and stir and
>stir watching such programs or reading such books. I
>find the more I watch these cartoons or read certain
>children's books with my son, and allow myself to
>enter the story my imagination stirs, too. This is
>what I like about Amerindian mythological/traditional
>stories. These stories, as all myths of the world,
>were spoken to all ages at the fire, and children
>listened intently, and as they grew the stories grew
>with them and as adults one could listen to these
>stories and still find something worthwhile in them.
>I might be able to read a story, such as the "bridge
>musing", to a child and they could enjoy it, and yet,
>I've tried to ground a thinking into the story that
>might catch the attention of ones intellect, too. At
>least, this is my effort with some events I write
>about. I don't really know if my effort is coming
>across this way yet.
I am both adult and child. Your writing appeals to both.
>Thanks for listening. I find talking to another
>artist quite enjoyable about this kind of 'stuff', and
>for some reason, I say this to you, as artist to
>artist, thinking you know what I'm talking about - I
>don't know - do you know what I mean?
I am uncomfortable with the word artist for myself, but there is an
art experience which I breathe. To find someone who wants to share
this bone marrow experience is great. But if unharnessed I can get
pretty far out there. Propriety (Hate that fucking word!) has my
mouth bound, but I can talk to the moon and the stars.
Do I know what you mean? Maybe I do.
>night dark,
>snow bright,
>SA
night,
Marsha
*********
The universe is uncaused, like a net of jewels in which each is only
the reflection of all the others in a fantastic interrelated harmony
without end.
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