The peonese are especially fragrent this year, I am reminded of my grandmothers
house, patches of peonese in the back yard along the house, white painted
wooden siding
peeling, glazed windows. The stone wall leading to the barnyard. I miss those
times,
helping her hang laundry in the summer breeze the smell of fresh clean cloths
the manicured
house and yard her apron and dress. Early summer I can catch a glimpse of it
still, in the
smell of the peonies and painted wooden garage doors in town here today. Those
honest easy times, evenings of play in the orchard and down at the creek
catching
fireflies in the meadow, thinking If I caught enough I could light my room at
night.
Dreams of the future would fill my head, romantic visions of myself as a man.
She never complained that I picked her flowers only to give them to her.
I asked her questions about the things on her dresser, each one holding a
memory.
As the tiger lillies prepare to bloom this early summer day I remember
grandmother
and her special care, those magical times spent together, freeze pop in hand.
It seemed like time crept, hours long and things did'nt change much since the
40's.
Honostly, I long for those days, the dynamism of constant flux destroys my peace
of mind, I long for the static, my children grow too fast, my freinds die too
often
awash in the day to day grind. Most if not all of the people and places of my
youth are now gone, they exist on photograph and my memory. The world,
an entirely different place than it was 10-15 years ago. what happened the last
10 yrs? seems like people and things that havent aged for 30yrs suddenly
grew decrepid.
The house is a wreck, the constant bombardment of crisis does not allow me
to get very far before another emergency requires my immediate attention.
we rarely have visitors anymore.
before I know it it'll all be gone
in the everchanging flow.
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