Laura and lloyd <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote: Aside from gang families, there are situations and have been for some time in Minneapolis where families have expelled children from their homes. My daughter is 38 now, but when she was in high school our family hosted three different teens who had been kicked out by their families. All were under 17 at the time. None had support or could earn income while going to school. We had two of them for over nine months each and the other for a shorter period (sequentially, not all at the same time). Our daughter brought them home and asked for our help.
These were not gang kids but they had issues. All three are now educated and working adults. They were given the chance their families would not give them. Pamela Taylor: I have been where Laura was. When my daughter was in high school (she is now 27) she had a friend whose mother had kicked him out of the house. Why? Because he would not give her money to support her drug habit. This young man was working, doing well in school, babysitting for young teen mothers so they could go to programs to better themselves, and was a member of the first "group" to win a Minneapolis Award. He had nowhere to go, his older brother was already serving time in prison, his grandmother would not take him in because he was "too dark", on so on. Even though I was divorced and a single parent by then, there was no way I could not take him in. He moved in his senior year and graduated high school, and went on to college. During the course of that same year, his mother decided to move out of state and did not bother to tell me. I found out by accident. But the good news is that she has now been clean for a few years, and has a good relationship with her son. There were a few other kids who came and stayed when they needed to, and I simply helped where I could, and kept the communication with their parents open until they could return home. I believe there are many people who have quietly done the same. I think of Barb Lickness and her son Blake. She stepped into his life, seemingly (to me anyway) without hesitation, when his parent was unable to do the right, and it was a blessing to them both. Laura says: It seems to me there are many, many children like this. The gang label is too easy to put on and too hard to take off. Between those with justice involvement and those just out there kicking around, there is a wide spectrum of need among young people who are seeking a way to transition to productive adulthood. I'm not much in favor of blaming the parents. With our three, we discussed only what the kids wanted to talk about, we never heard from their home families, and we never tried to call them and tell them off. Our focus was the kids, not the tension in the family. This is not to everyone's taste, I realize. It gets up close and personal with the issue, but in my opinion, more of that is needed with less focus on blaming from ten miles high. That, I think, would do us all a lot of good. Pamela Taylor says: AMEN! Lyndale __________________________________________________ Do You Yahoo!? Tired of spam? Yahoo! Mail has the best spam protection around http://mail.yahoo.com REMINDERS: 1. Be civil! Please read the NEW RULES at http://www.e-democracy.org/rules. If you think a member is in violation, contact the list manager at [EMAIL PROTECTED] before continuing it on the list. 2. Don't feed the troll! Ignore obvious flame-bait. For state and national discussions see: http://e-democracy.org/discuss.html For external forums, see: http://e-democracy.org/mninteract ________________________________ Minneapolis Issues Forum - A Civil City-focused Civic Discussion - Mn E-Democracy Post messages to: mailto:[email protected] Subscribe, Un-subscribe, etc. at: http://e-democracy.org/mpls
