23 Sep. Rio misses routine drugs test at Carrington training ground. 10 Oct Before a hearing is held or charges made, Rio is suspended from the crucial Turkey game. Mark Palios, head of the FA says, "We want to be fair to Rio even though we all know he's as guilty as sin."
14 Oct. British government sports minister, Richard Caborn, threatens the FA with the loss of important government funding if they are not tougher on drugs in football. Caborn denied that his tough stance has anything to do with his being a season ticket holder at Highbury: "I am simply acting in the best interests of English football. Ferdinand is evil. ManYoo sucks. Come on Arsenal!" 18 Oct. Still no charges brought against Rio but FIFA say he should get a 12-month ban and fine of around 10,000 pounds. If the FA fails to impose strong discipline in this case, FIFA will intervene and over-rule the FA. Fatman Sepp Blatter added, "Whatever the English FA decides, FIFA will insist on doubling the punishment." 20 Oct. UEFA supremo Lennart Johansson says missing a drugs test should bring an immediate and lengthy suspension for anyone, whether innocent or guilty. "We have to show that we are tough on drug abuse," said Johansson as he washed down half a dozen Prozac tablets. "I'm sure Ferdinand is a confirmed drug addict who mugs old ladies to feed his addiction. He deserves a lifetime ban and that's what he's going to get." 22 Oct. The Olympic Committee Vice Pres, Richard Pound, praises the FA for taking a firm stance on drugs and hints that strong action in the Rio case will help the UK's Olympic bid for 2012: "The bigger the punishment, the better are the UK's chances. In fact a lifetime ban for Ferdinand would just about guarantee that London will get the 2012 Olympics. Go for it." 26 Oct. The European Union parliament calls for UK government to strip Ferdinand of his British citizenship. The German representative insists this should be done before United's CL game with Stuttgart. 28 Oct. Kofi Anan convenes an emergency meeting of the UN Security Council. In Resolution 2341 Ferdinand is unanimously condemned for "crimes against humanity." Member states are urged to hunt down Ferdinand and bring him to justice. 30 Oct. The Al-Jazeera news agency receives tapes said to be from Osama Bin Laden in which the bearded lunatic calls on all operatives of his Al-Qaida network to forget the USA and focus instead on Rio Ferdinand, "the New Great Satan." He called on fellow Gooners around the world to rise up and rid humanity of "this traitorous genocidal Cockney sonofabitch." 2 Nov. Ferdinand is abducted by sport-loving aliens from the mysterious Wenger Galaxy and is never heard from again. 4 Nov. Paul Scholes misses random drugs test at Carrington. ------------------------ Yahoo! Groups Sponsor ---------------------~--> Rent DVDs from home. Over 14,500 titles. Free Shipping & No Late Fees. Try Netflix for FREE! http://us.click.yahoo.com/mk9osC/hP.FAA/3jkFAA/GtUolB/TM ---------------------------------------------------------------------~-> Subscription info WWW http://red11.org/list Reply to: [EMAIL PROTECTED] [EMAIL PROTECTED] = subscribe to the list. [EMAIL PROTECTED] = unsubscribe from the list. Post message [EMAIL PROTECTED] Your use of Yahoo! Groups is subject to http://docs.yahoo.com/info/terms/
