In the name of Allah, the Most-Merciful, the All-Compassionate
"May the Peace and Blessings of Allah be Upon You"
Praise be to Allaah, we seek His help and His forgiveness. We seek refuge with
Allaah from the evil of our own souls and from our bad deeds. Whomsoever Allaah
guides will never be led astray, and whomsoever Allaah leaves astray, no one
can guide. I bear witness that there is no god but Allaah, and I bear witness
that Muhammad is His slave and Messenger.
Bismillah Walhamdulillah Was Salaatu Was Salaam 'ala Rasulillah
As-Salaam Alaikum Wa-Rahmatullahi Wa-Barakatuhu
TIPS FOR THE MUSLIM WOMAN & HER HOME
What does the home represent to each one of us ? Isnt it not the place where
one eats, rests, and enjoys the company of his family members? If we think
about those who are homeless, or living in shelters, or as refuges scattered in
temporary places, then we will realize the blessings of our home.
There are many motives for the believer to put their homes in order:
1. Protecting oneself and the family from the fire of Hell, and keeping them
safe from the Allahs punishment.
2. The great responsibility borne by the head of the household on the day of
judgment.
3. The home is a safe haven to protect us from evils and keep ones own evils
from people, it is a refuge prescribed by Islam at times of fitnah
(tribulation).
4. The home shares a big part of the human life, and therefore maintaining a
healthy home provides a good environment to spend the time in the worship of
Allah, and refraining from wrongdoing.
5. The home is an essential part of building the strong blocks for the Muslim
society.
Following are tips to help you revive and strengthen your Muslim home:
* Make Your Home a Place For the Remembrance of Allah
Revive your homes with all kinds of Dhikr.
The Prophet (peace be upon him) said:
"The likeness of a house in which Allah is remembered and the house in which
Allah is not remembered is that of the living and the dead, respectively."
We must make our homes places where Allah is remembered in all kinds of ways,
whether in our hearts, verbally, during prayer, by reading Quran, by discussing
Islamic issues, or by reading different kinds of Islamic books.
* Help Your Family Increase Their Faith
Encourage your house members to pray, fast, give charity as means of increasing
faith.
The Prophet (peace be upon him) said:
"May Allah have mercy on a man who gets up at night and prays, then he wakes up
his wife to pray, and if she refuses he throws water on her face." (Ahmad and
Abu Dawud)
Have a box at home for donations to the poor and needy: whatever is put in the
box belongs to them, because it is their vessel in the Muslim home.
If the family members see an example among them fasting on al-Ayyam al-Bid (the
13th, 14th and 15th of each Hijri month), Mondays and Thursdays, Tasuaa and
Ashura (the 9th and 10th of Muharram), Arafah, and frequently in Muharram and
Shaaban, this will be a motive for them to do likewise.
* Learn Supplications Related to Home
The messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) said:
"When any one of you enters his home and mentions the Name of Allah when he
enters and when he eats, the Shaytan says: 'You have no place to stay and
nothing to eat here.' If he enters and does not mention the name of Allah when
he enters, [the Shaytan] says, 'You have a place to stay.' If he does not
mention the name of Allah when he eats, [the Shaytan says], 'You have a place
to stay and something to eat.'". (Ahmad)
Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) also said:
"If a man goes out of his house and says, 'Bismillah, Tawakkaltu Ala Allah, La
Hawla Wa La Quwwata Illa Billah (In the name of Allah, I put my trust in Allah,
there is no help and no strength except in Allah),' it will be said to him,
'This will take care of you, you are guided, you have what you need and you are
protected.' The Shaytan will stay away from him, and another Shaytan will say
to him, 'What can you do with a man who is guided, provided for and
protected?'"
(Abu Dawud and Tirmidhi)
Aishah said:
"When the Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) entered his house, the first
thing he would do was use Siwak." (Muslim)
* Continuously Recite Surah Al-Baqarah to Ward Off Shaytan
Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) said:
"Do not make your houses into graves. The Shaytan flees from a house in which
Surat al- Baqarah is recited." (Muslim)
Concerning the virtues of the last two Ayat of this Surah, and the effect of
reciting them in ones house, he (peace be upon him) said:
"Allah wrote a document two thousand years before He created the heavens and
the earth, which is kept near the Throne, and He revealed two Ayat of it with
which He concluded Surat al-Baqarah. If they are recited in a house for three
consecutive nights, the Shaytan will not approach it." (Ahmad)
* Teach Your Family
Allah says:
"O you who believe! Ward off from yourselves and your families a Fire (Hell)
whose fuel is men and stones..."
Allocate some time for the family, and even for others such as relatives, to
hold a study-circle at home and encourage them to come regularly, so that it
will be an ongoing commitment for you and them.
* Build Your Islamic Library
It does not have to be extensive; what matters is choosing good books, putting
them in a place where they are readily accessible, and encouraging family
members to read them.
Include books of varying levels, so that old and young, men and women can all
use them.
Also have books for giving to guests, childrens friends and family visitors,
but try to get books that are attractively presented, edited properly and with
the sources and classification of the Hadiths properly given.
One way in which you can help family members find a book when they want it is
to organize the books according to subject, Tafsir, Hadith, Fiqh ..etc.
* Have a Home Audio Library
Having a cassette player in every home may be used for good or for evil.
How can we use it in a manner that is pleasing to Allah? Having a home audio
library containing good Islamic tapes by scholars who are striving to raise the
awareness of the Ummah, establish proof and denounce evil is very important for
establishing individual personalities in the Muslim home.
Listening to Quran recitation will have a great impact on family members,
whether by reflecting on the meaning, or help memorizing it.
* Invite Righteous People and Seekers of Knowledge to Visit Your Home
"My Lord! Forgive me, and my parents, and him who enters my home as a believer,
and all the believing men and women...". [Nuh 71:28]
If people of faith enter your home, it will increase in light (Nur), and will
bring many benefits because of your conversations and discussion with them.
The bearer of musk will either give you some, or you will buy from him, or you
will find that he has a pleasant scent.
When children, brothers and parents sit with such visitors, and women listen
from behind a curtain or screen to what is said, this offers an educational
experience to all.
If you bring good people into your home, by doing so you keep bad people from
coming in a wreaking havoc.
* Avoid Showing Family Conflicts In Front of Others
It is rare for people to live together under one roof without any arguments,
but reconciliation is better and correcting oneself is a virtue.
What shakes the unity of the family and harms its infrastructure is when
conflicts are brought out into the open before the members of the family, who
then split into two or more opposing camps, not to mention the psychological
harm that is done to children, especially little ones.
Think about a home where the father says to the child, "Do not speak to your
mother," and the mother says to him, "Do not speak to your father."
The child is confused and filled with turmoil, and the entire family lives in
an atmosphere of hostility. We should try to avoid conflict, but if it happens,
we should try to hide it.
We ask Allah to create love between our hearts.
* Have a Schedule for Meals And Bedtime
There is nothing nicer than a family gathering together at the table and making
the most of this opportunity to ask how everyone is and to discuss useful
topics.
* Spread Kindness in the Home
Aishah (may Allah be pleased with her) said:
"The Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) said: 'When Allah - may He be
glorified - wills some good towards the people of a household, He introduces
kindness among them.' ".
This is one of the means of attaining happiness in the home, for kindness is
very beneficial between the family members, and brings results that cannot be
achieved through harshness, as the Prophet (peace be upon him) said:
"Allah loves kindness and rewards it in such a way that He does not reward for
harshness or for anything else." (Muslim)
* Be Affectionate
Showing affection towards family members is one of the things that lead to
creating an atmosphere of happiness and friendliness in the home.
The prophet (peace be upon him) used to show his affection towards his wives,
children and everyone around.
Abu Hurairah said:
"The Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) kissed al-Hasan ibn Ali, and
al-Aqra ibn Habis At-Tamimi was sitting with him. Al-Aqra said: 'I have ten
children and I have never kissed any one of them.' The Messenger of Allah
(peace be upon him) looked at him and said: 'The one who does not show mercy
will not be shown mercy.'"
* Resist Bad Manners in The Home
Every member of the household is bound to have some bad characteristics, such
as lying, backbiting, gossiping and so on. These bad characteristics have to be
resisted and opposed.
Aishah said:
"If the Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) came to know that one of his
household had told a lie, he would try to ignore him until he repented." (Ahmad)
* Shield Your Home Against Common or Hidden Evils
Beware of non-Mahram relatives entering upon women when their husbands are
absent.
Men and women should sit separately during family visits.
Beware of the dangers of having male drivers and female servants in the house.
Beware of the dangers of TV.
Beware of the evils of the telephone.
Remove everything that contains symbols of the false religions of the Kuffar or
their gods and objects of worship.
Remove pictures of animate beings.
Do not allow smoking in your homes.
Do not keep dogs in your homes.
Avoid too much decoration in your homes (keep it simple).
* Pay Attention to Familys Health and Safety
When any member of his family got sick, the Messenger of Allah (peace be upon
him) would blow on them and recite al-Muwidhatayn (last two Surahs of the
Quran). (Muslim)
When one of his family members got sick, he would call for soup, and it would
be made for him, then he would tell them to drink it, and he would say, "It
will strengthen the heart of the one who is grieving and cleanse (heal) the
heart of the one who is sick just as any one of you wipes the dirt from her
face." (Tirmidhi)
>From "40 Recommendations for the Muslim Home" by Sheikh Muhammad Al-Munajjid
Khadejah Jones
Share Islam Team
ShareIslam.com
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