On Tue, Jan 09, 2018 at 07:10:23PM -0800, Alvaro Retana wrote: > Alvaro Retana has entered the following ballot position for > draft-ietf-netmod-revised-datastores-09: No Objection > > When responding, please keep the subject line intact and reply to all > email addresses included in the To and CC lines. (Feel free to cut this > introductory paragraph, however.) > > > Please refer to https://www.ietf.org/iesg/statement/discuss-criteria.html > for more information about IESG DISCUSS and COMMENT positions. > > > The document, along with other ballot positions, can be found here: > https://datatracker.ietf.org/doc/draft-ietf-netmod-revised-datastores/ > > > > ---------------------------------------------------------------------- > COMMENT: > ---------------------------------------------------------------------- > > (1) Please add a sentence to the Introduction explaining how this document > updates rfc7950. I know that a couple of sections explicitly indicate what > part of rfc7950 they update, but having a short summary at the beginning would > be nice. > > (2) Section 3 says: “It is expected that the revised definitions provided in > this section will replace the definitions in [RFC6241] and [RFC7950] when > these > documents are revised.” Why not formally Update those documents here? [See > my > note above about the Update to rfc7950.]
The formal 'update of RFC 7950' is driven by the sections 6.1 and 6.2 and not so much to the terminology section. While we expect that the terminology wording will be harmonized in a future revision of RFC 7950, this does not seem to require a formal update of RFC 7950 at this point in time (since the definitions are semantically equivalent). So back to the abstract: We could be more explicit by saying: This document updates the definition of the XPath context and the invocation context of operations in RFC 7950. Personally, I think this makes the abstract harder to read. Perhaps a better solution is to leave the abstract as is and to add this one sentence paragraph to the Introduction (before the key words boilerplate text). This document updates RFC 7950 by refining the definition of the accessible tree for some XPath context (see Section 6.1) and the invocation context of operations (see Section 6.2). > (3) s/Section 4.4 of this document/Section 4.4 of rfc6244 Yes, this is better. /js -- Juergen Schoenwaelder Jacobs University Bremen gGmbH Phone: +49 421 200 3587 Campus Ring 1 | 28759 Bremen | Germany Fax: +49 421 200 3103 <http://www.jacobs-university.de/> _______________________________________________ netmod mailing list [email protected] https://www.ietf.org/mailman/listinfo/netmod
