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Bayou Politics 101, 102, 103 & 104

"Here's a tip for understanding Louisiana politics for those of you who
don't live here: You can't."

- Rich Galen, "Mullings," 11/13/02

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In Your Heart You Know He's (Still) Right

Join the "next generation of Goldwater Conservatives" by joining the
Goldwater Club. Annual dues for as little as $25. Just go to:
http://www.chuckmuth.com/goldwater.htm

***********************************
Attention: Nevada Republicans

If you're interested in a brilliant post-election analysis highlighting one
of the few blown opportunities this election cycle for Republicans, check
out my "Where the GOP Screwed Up" column in this week's edition of Las Vegas
CityLife:

<http://www.lasvegascitylife.com/display/inn_opinion/Guest_Commentary/opinio
n%20scorched%20muth.txt>

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I Feel a Lawsuit Coming On

"(Regarding the "Ten Little Indians" flap), you asked: 'Was that
insensitive?'  Well, us senior citizens have lost some of our sense of
balance.  I was laughing so hard as I read your final rant, I fell off my
chair and sprained my left wrist as I hit the floor, still laughing my ***
off.  Yes, I'd say you are insensitive.  Have a little consideration for old
folks.  Keep on trucking, you're good."

- News & Views reader Jose Diaz

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Touchy, Touchy

Seems y'all hit a rather raw nerve by daring to challenge the politically
correct decision to rename the "Ten Little Indians" play at Paint Branch
High School.  Looks like we ruined somebody's day.  Here's the response
principal Jeanette Dixon sent to News & Views reader Tom Henderson.

"I find your e-mail rude and insulting. You don't know anything about me or
my school or the situation here. I am always amazed at what people will
write on e-mail as you hide behind it as opposed to talking with someone
directly. You need not write back because I will not open any more e-mail
from you."

Omigosh, that sounds like a challenge.

So if any of you aren't scaredy-cats and have the gumption to call Ms. Dixon
directly instead of "hiding" behind your email address, her phone number is:
(301) 989-5600.  But I sure hope you all don't flood her office with calls
(wink, wink).  It might ruin another of her days.

***********************************
Uh-Oh, Here We Go Again

"It was going to be a night to remember. Ushers dressed in World War II
military uniforms, vintage cars pulling up to the curb, Pearl Harbor
survivors and a recently restored 1940s military searchlight would be on
hand Dec. 7 to greet the crowds at a special anniversary showing of 'Tora!
Tora! Tora!' at San Pedro's historic Warner Grand Theatre.

"The 1970 film - a joint American and Japanese production - is considered
one of the most accurate depictions of events leading up to the 1941
Japanese bombing of Pearl Harbor. Expected to attract hundreds, the showing
on the 61st anniversary of the attack was to serve as a fund-raiser for the
Fort MacArthur Military Museum in San Pedro.

"But now the show is off.  Why? Veterans and museum members say it's simply
a case of political correctness run amok.

"While there was a previous theater booking for Dec. 7, according to theater
manager Lee Sweet of the city's Department of Cultural Affairs, which
manages the facility, Los Angeles City Councilwoman Janice Hahn concluded
that the event would have been insensitive to the Japanese-American
community."

- Donna Littlejohn, The Daily Breeze, 11/13/02
<http://www.dailybreeze.com/content/bln/nmtora10.html>

PUBLISHER'S NOTE:  Um, I don't suppose I need to even say anything here
other than: Ms. Hahn can be reached at <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> or
(213)-473-7015.

Geez, these goofs are suddenly coming out of the woodwork.  Next thing you
know, House Democrats are liable to select a real-life, honest-to-badness
San Francisco liberal as their new party leader.

What?  You're kidding.

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Telephone, Television & Tell-a-Friend

If you know someone who might like to join the growing army of conservatives
(and a few Palm Beach Democrats) who receive our FREE Chuck Muth's News &
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**********************************
Geriatric Park

"Chuck, I think it's time for the Democrats to change their mascot from the
donkey to the dinosaur."

- News & Views reader Tom Gadd

***********************************
Screwin' the Pooch in 'Bama II

"Our conservative Republican candidate for Alabama Secretary of State lost
by 2,000 votes to a liberal Democrat who was President of the liberal
Alabama Education Association.  She was in the Gore campaign.  The
Libertarian received 30,000 votes."

- News & Views reader John Killian

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Screwin' the Pooch in Goldwater Country

"The worst example of Libertarians screwing it up for conservatives is the
Arizona Governor's race:

Napolitano (D): 566,283 (46.2%)
Salmon (R): 554,458 (45.2%)
Hess (L): 20,356 (1.7%)

"Now we have a radical liberal (she was one of Anita Hill's attorney's
during the Thomas hearings) as governor because the Libertarians didn't
think Salmon (a rock-solid conservative member of the '94 revolution in
Congress) was 'pure' enough.

"To make matters worse, when it became apparent that Napolitano would win,
the Libertarian candidate called the state party to see if he could 'give'
his votes to Salmon.  He should of thought of that BEFORE the election."

- News &  Views reader Sean Noble

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Oh, THIS Is Choice

"You'd better sit down before you read this item, that's how shocking it is.
An anonymous blogger called 'The Mighty Barrister' reports that SaveRoe.com,
a Planned Parenthood Web site, is running an 'artwork and poster contest' in
honor of next year's 30th anniversary of Roe v. Wade. Entrants are invited
to submit 'an original piece of artwork or poster that celebrates 30 years
of choice and illustrates the concept that 'Behind Every Choice is a Story.'
'

"So far, so good. But scroll down to 'terms and conditions' and you find
this: 'Children under age 18 must have a parent or legal guardian's
permission to submit their designs and for us to publish it along with their
name.'

"Does the First Amendment have an age limit? There's no age limit in the
amendment that guarantees the right to abortion (sorry, but we forget the
number), at least according to Planned Parenthood. So how come if a kid is
old enough to have an abortion, she's not old enough to make a poster
celebrating choice?"

- Best of the Web, 11/13/02

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Giving Mad Dogs a Bad Name

"Chuck:  At this time, I believe the crisis in medical care has become a
deadly plague that threatens the nation's health care system.  It should be
a number one priority to reign in the mad-dog tort lawyers with federal
legislation.  This should be a great deal easier considering the majority is
now Republican and it should be a small matter to remind the Senate Majority
Leader and the house Speaker all of the money used to bribe legislators has
gone to democrats."

- News & Views reader Gerald D. Seypura

***********************************
Political Yogi Berra

"My colleague Brendan Riley, the veteran AP reporter in Carson City
(Nevada), scored a quote that already is getting national play from party
switching (Nevada state) Sen. Ray Shaffer (he switched from D to R this
week).  Here's the quote, which earned Shaffer the moniker 'Breakfast Flake'
in the Hotline:  'If my father was alive today, he'd probably roll over in
his grave,' Shaffer told Riley."

- Jon Ralston's "Flash," 11/13/02

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American Taliban?

"The ministry of The Jesus Party will host an Anti-Harry Potter Conference
in the theatre room at the Ramada Inn at 7 p.m. Thursday, Nov. 14.  The
conference will conclude with the cutting up of the 'Harry Potter and the
Chamber of Secrets' book."

- Lewiston (Maine) Sun Journal

*********************************
Conservative Books for Your Christmas List

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"The Threatening Storm" -- From Kenneth Pollack -- a top CIA Iraq expert:
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"First Among Equals" -- Ken Starr reveals: How the Supreme Court became the
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it.To order now, click here:
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ME005601>


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Published by The Goldwater Club
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