If you only wanted to delete a few then, yes you are correct. However,
how many is "a few" before the IN becomes extremely long?. I don't
know if there are any performance hits for a large number of IN
statements. If there is, I presume this would be different for each
database type. Could (should?) NH be coded to deal with this?

btw, you example said:

A.myChildren.clear();

Which suggested to me to delete all the children for the current
parent, hence my SQL suggestion.

Unless someone tells me differently, NH will not do this "delete all
children for a foreign key", which I feel it should as it performs
significantly better than row by row delete or, I expect, via a list
of IN key values. This is something I suspect is quite common.

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