Here is a story from today, 'speaking from the circle', this time the
/Circle line/ of the London Underground. The amazing Jon Harvey, friends
Winston Moore and Anthony Albert Moore Bastos and myself undertook a
small experiment - we 'opened space' on a sunny subterranean Friday
afternoon between station stops with travellers hopping on and off with
fellow strangers - what kind of space, we are now asking [/why/ is
certainly another question - see www.scarletwindmill.blogspot.com
<http://www.scarletwindmill.blogspot.com>] ? Well we each felt the
sanctity of the internal space - the independent and private and
protected individual passenger...the very British reserve in two of our
team, and the very Bolivian warmth of the other two. We encountered the
solo, the coupled, the groups, different personalities, different moods,
different reactions - a (surprising? assumptions becoming conscious)
large proportion wanted to connect, to engage, to support the idea of
direct human communication (in unexpected context, contrasting the
exclusion that comes with those engrossing phones and web-based
garrulousness) - so many non-Brits so adamant that London is a friendly
and chatty place, the word 'sorry' comes before the offensive gesture,
the ear-phones were readily removed, the wary smiles wanting to be
reassured - and of course we were at our least intimidating/weird
[entirely subjective I guess] - and plenty of others did not get
disturbed through unconscious/unobservable collusion. Jon feared that
standing over the seated passenger would be wrong, I felt that this made
me seem less committed/imposing than sitting besides....our young
colleague was boldest in inviting strangers to converse with each other
(bypassing our estimable facilitation). A sense of community/social
capital circulating on the circle today? [in the midst of news stories
here about 'who is having a good/bad time of it really?', and what
measures happiness, and how people were Good Samaritans or Apathetic
Bystanders during our tube terror attacks in 2005, etc etc] - an
existential moment is opened - a psychic and social space.
On the subject of 'owning' a theme, and of 'engaging too intimately'
with the people doing the work...here we were more authentic
(conscious/sentient/reflective practitioners?) I think - a pure
disengagement/affected indifference is as great a risk to the quality of
interaction and outcomes as the unthinking misuse of the hosting power?
We were drawn into our agendas, we looked for appreciative inquiry, we
drew on our practice and experience with (among other things) group
relations, systems thinking and Zeldin's big conversations...would love
to hear more from people drawing on meta-methodologies to weave these
new human fabrics....
*Anne *
------------------------------------------------------------------------
*From:* Suzanne Daigle <[email protected]>
*To:* [email protected]
*Sent:* Friday, 19 November, 2010 12:06:57
*Subject:* Re: speaking from the center
Dear Michael (first) and all the other amazing people who have spoken
here also,
Meshing the physical, the words, the feel, the intention: how well you
have described this Michael starting with the beautiful example of the
wheel chair. In that moment, I somehow felt what it must feel like to be
sitting in a wheel chair and how often, they must feel people tower over
them. Not wanting to tower over people by being too close can also
happen as my eyes meet those of the participants so I apply this same
intention leaving private space for people to breathe into what they are
feeling, nervous, uncomfortable, etc. That's why as I let my eyes meet
those of the participants walking the circle for the first times, with
some people it may only be a split second, with others a tiny bit
longer. I want to honor and respect their physical space and internal
space.
I also just love the transition you describe from the focus on you to
the group beginning to focus on itself while walking the circle.
Harrison mentions how he invites the group to let their eyes go around
the circle; your description brings awareness to this transition.
And then finally, the pre-work you speak of in weeks and months) which I
have also experienced, feeling at times it is a journey of mutual
courage to accompany a client and a team as they wrestle with the
difficult moments of inviting people to something that they cannot fully
describe as most often they have not experienced open space themselves.
I am always humbled by their trust and the deep relationship that develops.
But oh my....what I have understood so "/painfully" /just now is what I
have done wrong too many times, "caring too much" for the theme,
sometimes almost more than the sponsor or host. When the theme touches
my sense of values and principles, I become so energized...too energized
during the pre-work and I know now (painfully but with such appreciation
to you Michael for bringing it to a very deep awareness for me) that in
doing so I was consuming space that belongs to the host and the group.
Learning this and practicing this will be my next very big challenge. I
also realize now that by engaging too much on the theme with the host,
it can make the post-work all the more difficult. I think that perhaps
my relationship with the host/team may be too close.
Now to lighten the topic a bit, I agree Harold that it's so wonderful
walking the circle when we know some or many of the participants. I've
often thought of opening space is the same way that I like to welcome
people to my home. Typically in the most comfortable way possible (not
too stuffy or fancy or to impress) I prepare everything ahead (food,
space, dishes, fridge full, welcoming, tidied up and clean with time
before they arrive for me to relax and imagine them there). Then my
mission is to have my home become their home, no hosting or
working/serving just showing them where stuff is and then letting
everyone be equal to just relax and have a great time.
Hugs to all, smiling now as I think of all this wonderful insight for
Eleder, who in the end need only remember to just be himself and enjoy.
Suzanne
On Fri, Nov 19, 2010 at 5:44 AM, Michael M Pannwitz <[email protected]
<mailto:[email protected]>> wrote:
A few years ago I badly strained my foot and could move about only
in a wheel chair... which I also did facilitating an open space with
200 highschool students on the issue of racism ("Me, a racist?" was
the theme). I did feel very relaxed being "de-elevated" and at the
same level with the students as I "walked" the circle.
Reflecting on that experience I now always take care to have a
circle of at least 10 meters in diameter so that I am not too close
to the seated participants, too towering as I walk (my habit is to
walk it once or a bit more than once, sometimes two times...
changing my mode of movement after that "focusing the group" part
which I do with the idea that the group begins to focus on itself...
and eventually using the entire space as a dancer would on a stage
with the idea that it is a space that can be used in all ways possible).
On prework: I do work intensively with the sponsor and the planning
group on all aspects of the event sometimes months before the OS
event itself with the result that I get to know them, they get to
know me and, of course, I also get to know about their theme and
what it is they want to achieve.
All that I now consider a side-effect.
What I am really interested in is that they craft their event and
that they are clear on their theme and on what they want to achieve.
I, however, focus on the myriad of things that I know support their
work: the space, the time, the material, the food, the documentation
technicalities, the public address system, the team, the briefing of
the sponsor, facilitating the planning meeting and the Next
Meeting(s) after the event... and, of course, getting myself into
the mysterious mode of "presence and invisibility".
Essentially, my relationship with the theme will not substitute
their passion for it. I respect it, yes. And my relationship with
the people which inadvertendly developes is much less essential than
the spirit that developes in the Planning Group, for instance. I
love them, yes.
My experience is that me getting into the theme (more than even the
participants) or my relationship with the Planning Group becoming
intensive (more than the relationship between the members of the
Planning Group) can deflect the focus in a way that both my presence
and invisibility necessary for my focus on space and time for the
forces of selforganisation are deminished.
Greetings from Berlin
mmp
Harold Shinsato wrote:
Great sharings from all around...
This might also help... something I read in a book about llama
care. Llamas don't like to be touched normally, but if you do it
often enough they become desensitized and won't mind being
touched and handled. The same is true for a lot of things humans
don't feel comfortable about - at first. It's one of the reasons
Lisa's training was so valuable for me - getting experience
walking and talking in the circle "desensitizes" to the
discomfort so one can spend more time tuning into the energy of
the room and being what they need from me as a facilitator.
That's also a lot easier when I already feel I have a
relationship with the theme and the people because of strong
pre-work (another thing Lisa emphasizes).
It has also helped knowing a lot of the people in the room -
getting a chance to talk make eye contact even before getting
into the circle, and having some friendly faces to help remember
it's all good.
And the trick that Harrison mentioned is also something that
Dale Carnegie put in his "How to Win Friends and Influence
People" classic. If you feel nervous, just admit it and move on.
The transparency puts people at ease and you stop having to
fight wondering whether anyone is noticing that you are nervous.
Harold
On 11/18/10 9:42 PM, Lisa Heft wrote:
Hello, dear Eleder - once again you ask great questions.
Everyone has shared so wonderfully.
The only things I would add are:
In my Open Space Learning Workshop one of the things folks
do is practice walking and talking in that circle.
And yes - others have mentioned as you have their concern
with having their backs to someone as they speak.
What they have found is similar to what was mentioned here -
if you look a few people ahead and keep moving (slowly,
breathing, present) you are indeed never having your back to
anyone for very long. If you turn your head as you move you
are including people behind you as you travel, as well. If
your voice is loud enough or you have a microphone everyone
can hear you even if you are not facing everyone.
Of course this is all different if some people in your
circle have any hearing differences such as deafness or
other hearing loss - so it is always good to ask on
registration forms who has any access / ability / mobility
issues they would like to bring to event coordinators'
attention. Then you have this extra info if you need it for
some individuals, and can give them extra eye contact or
some notes as well.
*
/
It is true that having too small a circle and towering over
people is hard for them - so do make a nice big circle with
room in between each chair. And if it is too small on the
inside I see no problem with walking the outside of the
circle (though when I have done this some of my OS
colleagues have *gasped* !. But it is so I do not close
everyone in too tightly, in those instances.
I have also learned from my workshop participants that if
you have any nervousness about looking people in the eye,
try instead....looking at the tops of their heads (!).
It often feels like you are looking at them - try it.
But I think you will become more and more comfortable as you
practice, sort how you like to say things, and experience
yourself doing it more and more.
Sometimes if it is a tense event to come - I may set up the
circle and then walk, it, before any participants arrive.
And I envision the participants and their listening faces,
and I smile and welcome them before they get there.
Mostly - Suzanne said it so well: it is of course not about
you. It is about them. So if you focus on them and on making
your voice and the instructions something they can hear and
that invites them, then once you begin you are in
partnership with them - and they can feel it...
And the other 'mostly' is: remember you are in your walking,
your breathing, your explaining - creating a container that
is open and welcoming and has tools and a process - so that
they can do their best work.
You are with your walk, your voice, your instructions, your
breathing... weaving that open and inviting container. And
in your walking you are invoking (calling in) energy.
And you know how to do that, dear Eleder - just....
breathe.... and ... go.... and be amazed, as I know you are....
Lisa
Lisa Heft
/
*
Consultant, Facilitator, Educator
*Opening Space*
[email protected] <mailto:[email protected]>
<mailto:[email protected]
<mailto:[email protected]>>
--
Harold Shinsato
[email protected] <mailto:[email protected]>
<mailto:[email protected] <mailto:[email protected]>>
http://shinsato.com
twitter: @hajush <http://twitter.com/hajush>
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