My Dearest Peggy, and my oslist friends.
I have been away for few weeks and since I came back I practically find
it impossible to catch up...
As I came back I became aware of the thread you initiated that had to do with
the middle east.
I find it hard , painful , and exhausting to try to articulate (in English!,
makes it so much harder) all that I think and feel right now both as an
indevidual and a proffessional but I do not want to stay out of this space that
you have opened. I am moved by everyone's sincerity, deep concern and
willfulness to help. That energy knocks on the tired, closed to communication,
space in me right now. Thank you :
My oldest son, Assaf, will join the Israeli army on July 23, 2001. It is a
mandaroty 3 years service for every youngster at 18. I am not able to see any
horizon that beams hope, comfort or meaning for the first time in my personal
history. I know (in my mind) this "no end" is only an illusion but yet this is
how I feel lately. I guess for me this is the hardest to take. At times I do
not find enough internal assurance that " everything is as it should be"...and
when I do, it is when I am better able to carry the pain, both of Palestinians
and Jews, personal and collective.
Like your border, Peggy, I asked myself many times 'how can I help'
generate good?
for the last two years I was on the board of directors of "Besod Shiach" a non
profit organization comprised of professionals who work to promote and enable
dialogue between groups of extremes in the Israeli society ( religious and
secular; Israeli Arabs and Jews; Sfaradic and Ashkenazi ect. ) I served on the
management team of a yearly Conference designed to "explore responsibility,
authority and leadership in a society with multiple identities". it took place
during the riots of October 2000 in Pekiyin, an Arabic village in the Galilee,
that also has Druze families and even one family. Inspite of the surrealism we
went on with it for 3 days and nights. It was very intense and very moving on
the personal and group level, yet not nessecerely hopeful all the time. There
where dead ends and hopelessness, detours and creativity and rage and
compassion...but the bout of our country and region was rocked so hard that
from where I stand it is only a drop in the ocean .
Probably there is a lot of space needed to let go of fear and hearted .
As for now I focus on the little good I defenetly can do very well and
that is help creating/opening some space for deferent people wherever they are
willing to try, practicing some "anti dot treatment" to balance out slammed
space.. and along with that trying to hold some space for me, my son, family,
friends etc. Leave some space for a day in a life of an individual.
Thank you for thinking about the middle east with compassion, I can breath the
oxygen
much love to you and all of you
your friend in the limitless space
Tova
Tova Averbuch
34 Rabinovitz
Holon 58672
Israel
972-3-5523476
