In conflict, for me, I want each person to be able to tell their whole story, without interruption, and to be heard with compassion. First I ask them to tell me the story alone, Let it crock pot (Simmer) for a few days and then share it with the other. I want nothing in the room but chairs, no place to hide and nothing to get behind.
Yes, OS is in many ways the essence of conflict resolution (my practice) as in OS a person takes responsibility and passion and is implicitly given the honor of a full listening. No two people are in a conflict it is the community as well. The process allows for and invites the participants to consider how to heal the community. I think when I am most successful the process works on a spiral with Macro and Micro weaving and separating. Dynamic processes invite/require open space. K e n Peace is Security -----Original Message----- From: OSLIST [mailto:[email protected]]On Behalf Of Chris Weaver Sent: Sunday, December 30, 2001 8:17 AM To: [email protected] Subject: conflict resolution (branching off from self organization...) Julie wrote, I wonder whether there are some important lessons for conflict resolution professionals in the work you're doing. I think the answer is yes, but I haven't quite figured out what the lessons are. Not knowing much about the profession of conflict resolution, I expect that there is a lot of resonance. I imagine that there are many mediators who see themselves as space-holders rather than fixers. I imagine that there are mediators who in some way invite those "in conflict" to consider a larger circle of viewpoints by holding space for a diversity of voices - not just the polarized "other" but a circle of those affected and those who care. My friend does victim-offender mediation, sometimes in the aftermath of violent crime. There is much in common about how he and I prepare for our work, but to me his space-holding requires more courage - warrior energy, tested tried & true. And an unwavering trust in & service to the transforming power of love. Interesting though...when I think of "conflict resolution" I picture two people across a table from one another, with a mediator in between, and I think, what a set-up. How could there be healing without the circle? How could healing be sustained without a circle of "the right people," who have responded to an open invitation? And what would be the theme? Thanks, Julie...I find a great deal to think about here. Chris
