Chris When encountering "space invaders" I've always found the sentence... "Sounds like a great session.."
A very useful internal mantra for anger or antagonism. As being attacked can freeze one with shock. If pushed sometimes I say that out loud... sometimes I just play it in my head and it helps ground me. As MARSHALL Rosenberg said all anger is the expression of an unmet need. Maybe a lot of anger is an as yet unexpressed session. It could have been a session about the question itself.. Best regards, Phelim McDermott ----------------------------- I generally pick up emails only at the beginning and end of the working day. I am currently aiming to respond the following day. If it is urgent please call me on 07956 187298. ___________________///////////// Sent from my iPhone > On 15 Apr 2016, at 07:56, Eva P Svensson via OSList > <[email protected]> wrote: > > Chris > Smiling when I read ”you need to go to therapy for your need of control” :-) > An Open Space facilitator ;-) > Reminds me of an Open Space some years ago - a ”citizens dialog” around the > city of Stockholm needed to build more place where people can live. It was in > an area where it was known that there was heavily resistans to the plans of > building. Well, the space was open, I went back to my chair and one man came > up to me and wanted to have the microphone to speak first…. I said - ”You are > welcome to raise your topic as anyone else” he looked angrily at me and said > ”SO! you are violating the democratic process!!!! And I thought with concerns > - am I really doing that perhaps? Since I at that time had no experience in > what we in Sweden call ”samråd” - i.e you have to involve people in the > decisions making process. So I was thinking that may be that was what we did? > - but I just had that thought going through my head for a milli second > because the next thing the man said to me was ”And besides you can’t speak > Swedish!! —> I’m from the south part of Sweden and do not have the accent > they speak in Stockholm :-) So then I realized that he just wanted to be > angry :-) > > Of course the OST went well, he was still there until the end and the group > wonderfully handled his antagonism and he was not able to infect the others > :-) > Trust the process > :o) > Eva > > Bästa hälsningar > > Eva P Svensson > > EPS Human Invest AB > Co owner Genuine Contact Group Inc > Medlem i Beyond Performance Group > > "Verksamhetsutveckling genom människor skapar långsiktigt välmående företag > och organisationer" > > Anåsbergsvägen 22, 439 34 ONSALA > Besöksadress; Norra Allégatan 8, Göteborg > Tfn: 0300-615 05, Mobil; 0706- 89 85 50 > www.epshumaninvest.se > Skype: eva.p.svensson > Facebook sida: EPS Human Invest AB > twitter:@EvaPSvensson > > "Jag kan inte lära dig något. Allt jag kan göra är att ställa frågor till > dig, och låta dig själv finna svaren." Sokrates > > > > > > > > >> 14 apr. 2016 kl. 18:54 skrev Michael Herman via OSList >> <[email protected]>: >> >> reminds me of an opening i did a long time ago, in an small group, about a >> dozen, i guess. on guy who thought he was pretty important interrupted >> several times, pushing to have a moment to go around the circle and hear >> names, organizations, titles and such. i put him off and put him off. i >> explained that we'd be learning much more than that about each other very >> shortly. >> >> finally, i decided his insisting was more disruptive than actually doing the >> go-round with names. we made it a little ways around the circle, when we >> get to one old and wise community organizer. he says, quiet and smooth as >> can be, "my name's lester and i'm just trying to figure out how to be a >> human being," giving the invader absolutely none of the info he was looking >> for and opening space for everyone else to answer without answering. in >> this case, one more thing to not do was to get out of the way of the invader >> and let the wisdom in the circle take care of itself. >> >> AND >> >> i also notice that this guy seemed to be objecting to your theme/question, >> which apparently was not part of the invitation that these folks responded >> to. difficult as this guy might have been, if the invitation changed >> between what was published (and he rsponded to) and what was stated in the >> opening, then he might have had a fair concern. at the same time, if his >> concern about the spin of the theme wasn't answered when he raised it, >> before everyone posted topics, then it could easily have seemed too late to >> raise it afterward. so in some ways, the guy was really stuck. it's a >> difficult thing to raise these structural questions/challenges. >> >> a different old community organizer friend sometimes took time at the >> opening to get agreement on the wording of the question. potentially very >> chaotic. i don't think i've ever done this, myself. sets up a kind of >> compound open space, opening a conversation on the theme of the >> conversations we want to have.... but in your situation, this might have >> been the thing to do. the guy clearly had some energy, well >> directed/managed (by himself, i mean) or not, and the way it worked out, >> this energy was lost to the group. >> >> thanks for bringing the story, chris. >> >> michael >> >> >> >> >> -- >> >> Michael Herman >> Michael Herman Associates >> 312-280-7838 (mobile) >> >> http://MichaelHerman.com >> http://OpenSpaceWorld.org >> >> >> >>> On Thu, Apr 14, 2016 at 10:17 AM, Lisa Heft - via OSList >>> <[email protected]> wrote: >>> Chris, it sounds like you did all the right things. >>> >>> If we are to honor diversity, then we know that everyone does not feel >>> comfortable in Open Space - and that there is room for them to feel that, >>> too. >>> You honored the group and its objectives and energies, by asking that man >>> to wait for the agenda to be developed, and you honored that man by >>> separately inviting him to tell you his concern, and by receiving what he >>> felt he needed to say, however he felt he needed to say it. He was mad at >>> you - because he could be. Which to me, is also okay. The group handled >>> itself well, moving forward including (not being de-railed, moving forward) >>> him, in its way. Space for ranting, space for moving forward, space to be >>> witnessed (by you). The group afterwards indicated you had done the right >>> thing. >>> >>> Now, as a collaborative? I think this group should have given you more >>> info, more information that you would be doing something for them, and I’m >>> guessing they could give this man a follow-up to witness and hear his >>> concern, whether he wants to be in the group or not. Because if they wish >>> to continue together, they don’t just get an outsider in there and set them >>> up to deal with this guy and celebrate when this guy leaves. They need to >>> develop their own internal understanding of who they want to be and how >>> they want their membership to work. >>> >>> But to me, everything you did was invitational, and present. Good job. >>> >>> Lisa >>> >>> Lisa Heft >>> Consultant, Faciltator, Educator >>> Opening Space >>> >>> Open Space Learning Workshops >>> May - Donostia / San Sebastian, Spain >>> June - Oakland, California USA >>> >>> >>>> On Apr 14, 2016, at 4:30 AM, Chris Grady via OSList >>>> <[email protected]> wrote: >>>> >>>> >>>> I wanted to share an experience last night which surprised me in its >>>> vehemance, but did not make me question "whatever happens". >>> >>> >>> _______________________________________________ >>> OSList mailing list >>> To post send emails to [email protected] >>> To unsubscribe send an email to [email protected] >>> To subscribe or manage your subscription click below: >>> http://lists.openspacetech.org/listinfo.cgi/oslist-openspacetech.org >>> Past archives can be viewed here: >>> http://www.mail-archive.com/[email protected] >> >> _______________________________________________ >> OSList mailing list >> To post send emails to [email protected] >> To unsubscribe send an email to [email protected] >> To subscribe or manage your subscription click below: >> http://lists.openspacetech.org/listinfo.cgi/oslist-openspacetech.org >> Past archives can be viewed here: >> http://www.mail-archive.com/[email protected] > > _______________________________________________ > OSList mailing list > To post send emails to [email protected] > To unsubscribe send an email to [email protected] > To subscribe or manage your subscription click below: > http://lists.openspacetech.org/listinfo.cgi/oslist-openspacetech.org > Past archives can be viewed here: > http://www.mail-archive.com/[email protected]
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