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Seems this message didn't get through to the List.
Trying again. Thanks Annie for letting me know.
Hi
there ozlisters
Just
wanted to let you know that I have returned to the space I left about 3 months
ago. I have had the wonderful privilege of helping my daughter-in-law Emi
and my son Mark to make Emi's dad's passing as pain free,comfortable and as
peaceful as could be.
Mitsuaki came to Australia with his wife Tomiko almost 3 months
ago. His plan was do be able to die at home, painfree with his family and
myself helping him. To die in Japan this way was not possible. Emi
and Mark live just 10 minutes walk away from me. Before his arrival
we planned together what we thought would make living the way he wanted.
My two grandsons Joshua and Kai both born at home (Josh in Japan and Kai
in Melbourne) were part of the team. Emi's sister Yuka who lives in Sydney
flew came down on several occasions to help. Yuka is pregnant and her baby
is due in September.
Mitsuaki was very tired and sick after the flight from Japan. Tomiko was
by his side the whole time, she had been caring for him at home in Kofu until
she reached a point where it was all to much for her to continue. He had
some medical assessment and a few oncology treatments at St Vincent's Hospital,
the main purpose was to alleviate the pain of the pancreatic cancer which now
had progressed to secondaries of the liver. This was effective for the
time it needed to be. The major part of his care was nursing care at
home. Personalised medical care was provided by Peter Lucas (most of you
will know Peter), he is the most important medical practitioner in Melbourne who
cares for and supports women who choose to birth at home. So the team was
perfect for what Mitsuaki had asked for.
There
is another story of course, but don't want to dampen the spirit of Mitsuaki's
experience with such a negative experience in this space. Will tell this
story later if you want to hear it, about a local GP who wouldn't attend the
home and told my son that Mitsuaki had to go to hospital to
die.
His
health gradually deteriorated until it became full time nursing care. His
wife Tomiko provided the majority of his care with us helping her. Peter
visited once a week (about 1:30 minutes drive return for him) more if we
requested. Mitsuaki had a vitamin infusion in 1 litre of Hartmann's
solution about twice a week at his request. He had been having similar
treatment at a local clinic in Japan and wanted this to continue. His
blood tests remained quite stable till his death and we think that this
treatment contributed to his comfort. Hospice care was available if we
needed the service. He was kept pain free till the last 24 hours with the
help of oral morphia and then subcutaneous infusion for the last
night.
Mitsuaki died peacefully in his own bed at 10 am on Thursday 5th
August. His wife, two daughters, my son Mark, myself and Kai were with
him. Kai is 4 years old and he was wonderful, kept our spirits alive and
knew exactly what was happening in his own way.
After
we had all said farewell I was able to help Tomiko, Emi and Yuka prepare him for
his resting place. They washed and dressed him and kept him at home in his
bed till about 6pm that evening. This gave Joshua time after school to say
goodbye. Joshi wondered why we hadn't "pumped him with all the air
that was around us". I took him by the hand and told him that when we
die our heart stops beating, when that happens we can no longer breathe with our
lungs and that is why we couldn't "pump air" into his
lungs. He was very accepting of this and responded by touching and saying
goodbye. Joshi also asked to have a look at his eyes and we were able to
do this without any fuss. He comprehended that our pupils get large when
we die.
Peter
Lucas in a very loving and caring way completed the legal process of ensuring
death and doing the necessary paperwork. He also said goodbye to Mitsuaki
in a very tender and compassionate way.
We
prepared for the committal at home. Why take the farewell somewhere else
when his wishes were to be at home? Tomiko filled the house with bright
coloured flowers and requested his body to be covered with flower heads.
His
favourite classical music played in the background. The
celebrant planned a very natural committal with a verse that was translated for
two of Mitsuaki's high school friends who arrived just after his
passing. He left the home in the care of the funeral
directors who walked slowly with the Hurse until they were out of
site. The children participated in the funeral, placed flowers as
requested by Tomiko into the open coffin, then each of us placed a flower before
the coffin was closed. Such cherished memories.
He
asked for his ashes to be placed in several of the special places he had visited
in his life. Florence, Canada, Japan, Australia. Tomiko in time will
fulfil these wishes.
In the
time of Mitsuaki's illness in Australia I was able to help three women birth
their baby's at home. He was always interested in what I do, because of
his experience with Joshi and Kai being born at home.
Robyn Thompson *Independent Midwife [EMAIL PROTECTED] Robyn Thompson *Independent Midwife [EMAIL PROTECTED] |
- to die at home Robyn Thompson
- to die at home Paul & Maxine
- Re: To Die at Home CATHY AND NIGEL BOCK AND DUNCAN
- Re: To Die at Home idacq223
