Carolyn
As a consumer who has been privileged to benefit twice from the superb
skills in being 'with woman' that you speak about with an independent
midwife in Canberra, I just want to say thank you for this message. You put
it all so eloquently, and my admiration for midwives is deepened yet
further...
The anecdotes you relate just provide further evidence that a major
shortcoming of the dominant medical management of birthing women is the lack
of sufficient connection with each individual women re an emotional and
'whole of life' level. Midwives provide a truly essential service to
birthing women in this country. If only all birthing women knew the quality
of care being offered and provided by midwives there would be queues a mile
long outside every IPM's door!!
best wishes, Barb Vernon.
> From: "Heartlogic Consultancy" <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
> Date: Mon, 20 Aug 2001 12:39:10 +1000
> To: "Ozmidwifery" <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
> Subject: Questions (also longish) :-)
>
> Joy and Janet raise some good questions. Personally, I'm grateful for
> Einstein who teaches us that time and space are illusions :-)
>
> My guess is that sometimes women need time to process out of their 'issues'
> and so can circle around at 8cms, or with anterior lip ;-) the midwives
> code for buying time
>
> My impression is that feeling an internal sense of safety is a biggie where
> ever the birth is supposed to be happening
>
> My experience, understanding and reading from various sources (plus those
> late night midwife raves) would suggest that women who have experienced
> abuse, whether consciously remembered or not often stall at various stages
> in labour and those of us who don't feel all that wonderful at the idea of
> being a mother can stall and hold for ages (and even go backwards cervical
> dilatation wise, with the fetal head corkscrewing out of the pelvis or going
> asynclitic when the muscles of the pelvic floor tighten in resistance) when
> those first sensations of bowel pressure get triggered. Relationship issues
> impact upon birthing both negatively and positively and many a homebirth
> midwife maintains that labour is (most often) increased one hour for each
> extra support person there is present.
>
> It is a huge challenge to maintain faith and trust in women's processes -
> spiritual, mental and physical and whilst operating concurrently in the
> parallel universe, intervene as appropriate and necessary, and all the while
> maintaining deep respect for where women are at and what they want and how
> things go. To me, that is what midwifery is all about. Walking the hyphen
> between the worlds. The 'and'.
>
> Some stories that come to mind include:
>
> On a night shift as a casual, cared for a woman who was having her fourth
> baby and taking AGES - wasn't going quick enough for her - wanted to lie on
> the bed and have birth happen - baby was OP. I suggested she squat and talk
> her baby round - looked at me like I was mad and made a half hearted attempt
> to do so - I asked her what she was thinking, she told me "my baby's coming,
> my baby's coming' she didn't seem to speak or move with that focused
> clarity implied by that message, so I asked her 'what is the other half of
> you thinking?" she looked at me with a startled look of recognition and,
> after a moment said "I'm fighting with myself". I suggested she invite that
> other part of her to join the bit that wanted to birth her baby and help her
> give birth beautifully. She did and with the next contraction, squatted
> down very purposefully and the waters broke. She birthed her baby
> beautifully with the next couple of contractions. She said after the birth
> when we were discussing what happened, that until I had asked that question,
> she didn't realise she was in two minds about having the baby. The question
> helped her to become conscious of what was going on inside her and to take
> action.
>
> Another situation involved a women in her third pregnancy (two live healthy
> beautiful children) I had cared for as a private practitioner. She was a
> sweet, loving, kinda sad woman, whose husband was lazy and incredibly self
> indulgent. This woman was forever making excuses for him and mopping up
> around him in all aspects of their life together. She chose to birth in
> hospital and laboured well. Then the signs indicated it was time to birth
> the baby. No go. Every position, every possible combination of whatever
> was given a go. Nope. No birth. At one stage, she looked at me imploringly
> and said "I'm sick of being the strong one. I just want someone to help
> me". She wanted forceps and so the obstetrician helped her and she was
> grateful.
>
> Another was a young woman (hospital client) a natural health person with a
> naturopath husband. Her husband's first wife had had the dream homebirth.
> Accomplished, perfect - all well. The partner thought normal birth was
> easy and was scathing about intervention of any kind. He wasn't really
> present with his new partner - he was distant and blas� about birth and the
> effect it had on women. His first experience was so 'easy', he couldn't see
> what all the drama was about. He appeared dismissive of his present
> partner's experience. This young woman had read everything, had support
> people, was fully focused on it all being natural and went into labour at 41
> weeks and didn't progress. Was exhausted and upset that it wasn't
> happening. Wanted it to happen for 'him'. She began to feel victimised by
> her birth experience. Discussed possible options and he had to make the
> decision about the epidural. Had an epidural and didn't progress.
> Contractions were tumultuous and strong, no progress. She was tired and
> becoming distressed. Long labour, did everything possible. He ended up
> demanding a caesarean. Caesarean uneventful, beautiful baby boy. Her
> recovery was spectacular, she was up and about with ease in a day. Breastfed
> perfectly and was very happy with the whole thing. He was devoted, waiting
> on her hand and foot and full of concern for her welfare. He had a whole
> new appreciation of birth.
>
> Another poignant story is a young woman whose first baby died in labour -
> literally monitored to death. I cared for her as a private midwife (with a
> wonderful obstetrician as backup) in her second pregnancy which was full of
> exploration about safety and feelings of grief. She did NOT want a monitor
> in labour with her second baby. As I was listening with auscultation in
> early labour - I heard decelerations - we discussed possibilities and to
> exclude cord presentation involvement, I examined her and she was three
> centimetres dilated and the head was -2, no cord. I suggested the monitor
> and went out to get one. As I came back in, pulling the monitor with me,
> the woman was pushing and her beautiful healthy girl (cord around the neck)
> was born a couple of contractions later. She later told me there was no
> way she wanted that monitor on and knew she had to get that baby out!
>
> There are many more stories and each one a rich vignette of human potential
> and possibilities. Each story - each woman - each couple we meet and work
> with show us the incredible wonderful diversity of experience and response.
> It comes back to partnership, exploring knowledge and options, invoking each
> person's repertoire of coping skills, it involves choice and control and
> information sharing; it demands love faith and trust and a safety net to
> optimise outcomes for women and their babies.
>
> Often there are no answers to the questions we ask, there are always more
> questions.
>
> Celebrating women's innate birthing intelligence
>
> Carolyn
>
> "No pessimist ever discovered the secrets of the stars, or sailed to an
> uncharted land, or opened a new heaven to the human spirit"
>
> Helen Keller
>
>
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