BROOKVALE IDIOT
 The North Shore Times News crime column reported that a man walked into
Brookvale McDonalds at 8:50AM,  flashed a gun and demanded cash. The clerk
turned him down because she said she couldn't open the cash register without
a food order. When the man ordered a Big Mac, the clerk said they weren't
available until 10:30 am as only the breakfast menu was on offer.
 Frustrated, the man walked away.
 ADELAIDE IDIOTS
 Two men tried to pull the front off an ATM machine in
 Adelaide's Hindley Street by running a chain from the
 machine to the bumper of their Toyota Landcruiser, but
 instead of pulling the front panel off the Machine
 they pulled the bumper off their 4WD. Scared, and
 attracting attention from oncoming traffic, they left
 the scene and drove home, with the chain still
 attached to the machine, their bumper still attached
 to the chain,and with their vehicle's license plate
 still attached to the bumper. No,they did not use a
stolen car.
> > >
 WOLLONGONG IDIOT
 A man walked into a Seven-Eleven, put a $20 bill on
 the counter and asked for change. When the clerk
 opened the cash drawer, the man pulled a gun and asked
 for all the cash in the register, which the clerk
 promptly provided. The man took the cash from the
 clerk and fled, leaving the $20 bill on the counter.
 The total amount of cash he got from the drawer?
 Fifteen dollars.
 ROOTY HILL IDIOT
 Seems this guy wanted some beer pretty badly. He
 decided that he'd just throw a brick through a liquor
 store window, grab some booze, and run.So he lifted
 the brick and heaved it over his head at the window
 with all his might. The brick bounced back and hit the
 would-be thief on the head,knocking him unconscious.
 Apparently, the liquor store window was made of
 Plexi-Glass. And the whole event was caught on
 videotape, which the store owner consequently sold for
 use on TV.
 CAMPBELLTOWN IDIOT
 As a female shopper exited the Campbelltown K-Mart in
 Queen Street, a man grabbed her purse and ran. A shop
 assistant at K-Mart called the Police immediately and
 the woman was able to give them a detailed description
 of the snatcher. Within minutes,the police had
 apprehended the snatcher, trying to mingle in the
shopping crowd on Queen Street. They put him in the
 car and drove back to the K-Mart store. The thief was
 then taken out of the car and up to the K-Mart front
 desk and told to stand there for a positive ID.To
 which he replied; "Yes, Officer, that's her. That's
 the lady I stole the purse from."
 PORT MACQUARIE IDIOT
 When a man attempted to siphon petrol from a motor
 home parked on a Port Macquarie street, he got much
more than he bargained for. Police arrived at the
 scene to find an ill man curled up next to a motor
 home near spilled sewage. A police spokesman said that the man admitted to
trying to steal petrol and plugged his
 hose into the motor home's sewage tank by mistake. He
 had tried to siphone the petrol by first sucking it up
 the hose.The owner of the vehicle declined to press
 charges, saying that it was the best laugh he'd ever
 had.



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