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Hi Macha and all -
Macha, your words "now we have her going vaginal"
have me concerned -this poor woman is obviously terrified - of any way she is to
get this baby out. Please try to remember how vulnerable we all are at this time
- especially if we have been victims of scaremongering about birth.
Although it is over twenty years ago I remember the
fear as I approached my second birth after a yucky first one -as I came to my
due date I became very scared - as well as terror, mythoughts were -there is no
getting out of this Thankfully, I was in New
Zealand, where NOBODY was routinely offered medication let
alone a c/section and this baby came VERY easily -during my pregnancy,I was also
surrounded by women who felt comfortable with their bodies and it was this
confidence and reassurance that permeated my being, and reassurance that second
babies "know the way", rather than any pressure not to beg for
medication/epidural (as one male GP friend had suggested to me)
It really is HER choice - all we can do is gently
present information/ reading material and leave others to make their own
choices -in a state of fear and feeling pulled/pressured from every direction ,
labour is likely to be inhibited by the stress hormones -then she will be
'vindicated' if she does have a caesarean. This is a very special time
that shouldnt be a matter of any sort of pressure -even from those of us who
have experienced the joy of GIVING birth.
rather than scaring her also about the effects of
c/section, perhaps expressing some empathy towards her fear might help this
woman "open up" and this may have the effect of disipating some of her
anxiety,
The best start for any mother and baby relationship
is to feel safe and nurtured, whatever their choices. If she feels safer seeing
her doctor EVERY week, so what, if her anxiety is alleviated by this (anxiety
isnt healthy for baby either and it may be an early manifestation of depression
so does need to be monitored). Sometimes it is difficult to accept others
choices, but we need to offer support, not pressure .it IS after all THEIR
choice.
Pinky
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