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Dear Melissa,
There are just too many traumatic
births.
Your group will grow huge - I'm sure that thousands
of women will benefit in some small way, by sharing their stories.
Liz Mc
----- Original Message -----
Sent: Thursday, November 07, 2002 9:36
AM
Subject: [ozmidwifery] introducing
"birthtalk"
Hi - I have been lurking for a little while now, and after
all the discussion on Birth Trauma and c/secs etc, I felt I must come out of
lurkdom and introduce myself!
Firstly, for all the women who have been
sharing their traumatic experiences (Rhonda, Jo) - I am so very sorry for what
you had to go through to meet your babies. It breaks my heart. I
am grateful for your honesty - thank you.
I, too had a traumatic
caesarean, three and a half years ago. Actually, Cathy Cornack
(who was interviewed on the Dimensions program) asked me to be interviewed
with her for the show...but at that stage, I just couldn't do it. I was still
too raw and grieving. It took me 2.5 years to begin to grieve, and then
it came out with a vengeance. My story is so similar to Cathy's that we
couldn't believe it when we sat and compared notes : our babies were born a
month apart, planned Birth Centre birth in Sydney (we both have since moved to
Brisbane), very long labours, OP babies, non-supportive carers, sectioned at
around 9 cms, no post-natal support for the experiences, difficulties bonding,
and breastfeeding, and even just surviving every day.
I have since done
a lot of personal research, and a lot of crying, and a lot of talking, and
sharing on lists such as the ICAN (International Caesarean Awareness Network)
list and the hbac (Home Birth After C/sec) lists. It has been a long
road to healing. In fact Jenny Gamble, the midwife interviewed on NEw
Dimensions, was instrumental in my healing, as I spent about an hour crying to
her and sharing my story, in the early stages of my grieving. She really
helped me separate the grief from the trauma and made me aware that the trauma
would not go away on its own - it must be acknowledged and dealt
with.
So, anyway, now I have come such a long way, I have wanted to
share what I have learned, and help other women heal, or avoid what I went
through. So, along with my sister-in-law (a midwife and childbirth
educator), and a mutual family friend (a homebirth vbac mum), we have decided
to combine forces and start a positive birthing group.
Our group is
called "birthtalk : Sharing, Empowering, Celebrating Birth". We
aim to :
* provide a forum for women to share
their thoughts, expectations and experiences of birth
* empower women by
providing access to current and accurate literature &
information about
their birthing options
*encourage an atmosphere
of celebration of birth, and of ourselves as women.
We
had 10 women at the last meeting, 7 who have had caesareans, and 3 of those
women have had two c/sec births. All of these women have been
traumatised by their experiences except one (who was arguing right up until
theatre). We had one newly pg first time mum, and 2 home birth mums (one
was a vbac).
Actually, when we debriefed at the end of the
meeting, the first-time mum said that she had felt out of place at the start
of the meeting, then realised that she thought she could just be "taken care
of" and let the Dr look after her...but now realises that she is going to need
to read more, and take more responsibility, and be more informed. That
just sent a glow to my heart.
Anyway - just wanted to say hello - and
thank you to all of you for what you are doing to reform the way we birth, and
for having the courage to ask the questions.
Melissa
Bruijn
birthtalk meets monthly at Toowong, in Brisbane,
Australia
email us at :
[EMAIL PROTECTED]
Melissa : ph (07) 3356 7449
Debby : ph (07) 3379 7424
Karen : ph (07) 3720
1101
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